DOCTOR WHO MARATHON 67th MEET-UP - THE GREEN DEATH

Sunday 18th December 2016

It was time for the last meeting of 2016! Jason was better - but Mark was not!  He was ill at home!  We also had to meet a little later as Jason had been working earlier.  So, gathering around Jason's, the rest of us settled down to watch the last serial of Jon Pertwee's third season ....

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MJ: "Right we're around Jason's we're going to watch 'The Green Death'.   We've got no Mark 'cos it's the time of year - " *Starts singing to the tune of the 'Spitting Image' 'Chicken Song'* "Now that spring is in the air! With those two - "

Leigh: "- He's also got Green Death."

MJ: "He's got Green Death!"

Shaun: "Yeah."

MJ: "And that's what we're going to watch - 'The Green Death'!"

Shaun: "Ooo foam!  Maybe there's foam!  We like a bit of foam!"

Leigh: "Yeah!  Can we call this one 'Doctor Who Nights'!?"

*Laughter*

MJ: "Yes!"

Shaun: "We can but I think we'd all need to be more naked for that and I'm NOT interested in that happening!"

MJ: "That's a bit err... it worked for 'Baywatch'. And when I say 'worked'.... Yes 'Baywatch' did it - wasn't it 'Baywatch' crossed with 'Buffy' sort of?"

Leigh: "So I'm told, yeah."

MJ: "I've never actually, erm, seen it - and I don't know if anyone has!"

*MJ and Leigh laugh*
Jason: "Not enough people to keep it going" *Laughs*

Shaun: "It was David Hasselhoff in it, so the Germans have probably seen it - they like a bit of Hasselhoff."

Jason: "Can you see the TV?"

Leigh: "I'm not sure your TV's level!"

MJ: "Can you close your curtains?! The irony is - readers at home - that it's night time when we're meeting, on a Sunday, and it's dark.  So that's the joke....so enjoy that..." *Leigh laughs* "All you readers - Shaun..."

Leigh: "All of them!"

Shaun: *Laughing* "Due to Jason's insistence on working - rather than taking the afternoon off so we can do this at a f**king sensible time - we're now here wasting our Sunday evening!"

Jason: "I suggested we do it LAST week!  But Leigh, not Leigh, MARK cancelled!"

Shaun: "Yeah!  We should have done it last week!"

MJ: "Oh well thank God he's here this week!"

*Leigh laughs*

Jason: *Referring to DVD menu* "Play All, yeah?"

MJ: "Play, yes, play!"

Shaun: "PLAY!"

MJ: "Okay this is Episode One of 'THE GREEN DEATH...IN SPACE!!!'."

Jason: "It's not in Space."

MJ: "Oh."

Shaun: "It's in 'SPA-ACE'!!"

MJ: *Sings along with the theme tune* "Doctor Whoooooo - in space!"

Shaun: "What have we got left?   Like three serials after this?"

MJ: "Oh no! A whole - well this is the last one of this series and then there's another series."

Shaun: "Ahhhh - that's right.  This is the end of Jo or something?  Or coming to the end of Jo?"

Jason: "Or not."

MJ: "Maybe... we'll watch!"

Jason: "Wales!"

MJ: "Ooo yes a mining village - Welsh.  Err, minors underground.  Could it be the return of the Sea Devils or foam?   Or Range Rovers?   Let's see..."

*EPISODE ONE GETS WATCHED*

Photo 1: At Jason's house.
MJ (with the DVD case), Shaun (with the sign) and Leigh.

MJ: "There we go - end of Episode One and they're in Wales."

*Laughter*

Jason: "They were there at the beginning."

MJ: "Yeah and Jo's trapped in a mine and there's some bloke with green stuff on his hands."

Jason: "She's not trapped down the mine yet - she's plummeting!"

MJ: "She's plummeting down a shaft."

Leigh: *Dead-pan* "F-narr, f-narr."

MJ: "F-narr, f-narr. There's some Welsh people in it and..."

Jason: "Called 'Jones' and 'Evans'."

MJ: "Yeah."

Leigh: "Dai."

Shaun: "Hugh!"

MJ: "And the main guy who's got a 'tache - I don't remember his name - it looks like he had telepathy telling him what to do."

Jason: "He looked like he was having a stroke!"

*Leigh laughs*

Jason: "He thought 'Oh this episode is running a bit short - I'd better do something to make it last a bit longer'!"

*Leigh chuckles*

Shaun: "Yeah. He put on some enormous headphones which implies - "

MJ: "- He DID!   'Beats by Dr. Dre' as you said!" *Laughs*

Shaun: "- There's something more going on than it appears!" *MJ laughs* "Also he specifically told a bloke not to let anyone in the mine - and three people are already going down the mine since he told him that!"

Jason: "He only told the chauffeur assassin bloke."

Shaun: "Yeah?"

Jason: "Well it takes TIME to get messages to people!"

MJ: "Yeah."

Shaun: "Look, The Doctor is already f**king in that room - before he's even got there!!"

Jason "The chauffeur has taken as long to deliver the message, as he has took to receive it!"

*Shaun laughs*

MJ: "Part Two!"

*EPISODE TWO GETS WATCHED*

Photo 2: At Jason's house.
Jason (with the DVD case), Shaun (with the sign) and Leigh.

MJ: "So that's finished with Jo, being trapped with the Doctor, down the mine-shaft.  That's collapsing and they're being menaced by giant mutating maggots!   And Leigh asked 'Do they have mouths like that?   With sharp teeth?'  Erm, not normal ones but mutated-nuclear-ones do!"

Leigh: *Chuckling* "Oh alright! Okay."

MJ: "That's fine."

Shaun: "The next episode better start with the Welsh guys just trying to touch the maggots!"

*Leigh laughs*

MJ: "That was a game I once played in a nightclub!" *Laughs* "So we just established that the Welsh people are idiots because, immediately when they see this green, toxic goo, they go:" *Puts on Welsh accent* "Ooo what's this!?  Put my hand in it, shall I?!"

Shaun: "Yeah, especially Bert who knows of TWO people who have DIED from the f**king green, glowing goo so far!  He's immediately like" *Puts on Welsh accent* "Well I'd better go and touch it then, hadn't I, Boyo!" *Normal voice* "It's like, c'mon dude!"

Jason: "Are we breaking?"

MJ: "Yeah!"

Shaun: "Yeahhh."

Leigh: "We need tea!"

MJ: "You know the rule!"

Jason: "I know, but this is 'Baywatch Nights' now!"

*Leigh laughs*

Shaun: "Didn't we already dub our 'nights' thing - when we did it before and we had beer?"

MJ: "So are you enjoying this so far, Mr. Leigh?"

Leigh: "Erm, it's alright!" *Laughs* "I'm not sure giant maggots are going to be a great bad guy but...!"

Shaun: "But there is the weird, creepy voice on the TV monitor - who sounds a bit like 'The Master' but won't be."

Leigh: "Yeah."

Shaun: "THAT I'm into."

Jason: "Yeah it could go either way."

Shaun: "I'm hoping there's a talking maggot puppet at the end!" *Laughs and puts on voice* "SIMON! Simon, you must not let anyone in the mine!" *Leigh laughs* "That's what I'm really hoping!"

Leigh: "Who's Simon!?"

Shaun: "That's the head of 'Global Whateveritwas'!  They called him Simon."

Leigh: "Oh okay."

Shaun: "Yeah."

Jason: "Was that 'Stevens'?"

Shaun: "Oh 'Stevens' was it!!?" *Leigh laughs* "I knew it was a first name!!"

MJ: "Okay I don't think there's much to say - I'm enjoying it so far.   I'll pause it. Bye!"

Leigh: "The key doesn't work!  Your door's broken Jason!"

*EPISODE THREE STARTS*

MJ: "Part Three, by the way, and the cave is falling down where Jo and The Doctor are - and they could get crushed to bits.  But they probably won't and maggots erupt forth - through -"

Jason: "You could record that all the way through!"

MJ: "I should do.  That would be NOT annoying for all you lot!"

Shaun: "That would be great 'cos then you'd have to type it all up!"

Jason: *Laughing* "Three hours!"

*Leigh laughs*

MJ: "Jeez..."

Jason: "Maggots!"

MJ: "Convincing maggots?"

Jason: "Yeah I'd say!"

MJ: "I mean convincing maggots that have been affected by nuclear waste!"

Leigh: "Wait until they get close-up! It's going to be a man in a sleeping bag!"

*Laughter*
MJ: "Let's watch and find out!"

Jason: "Has there been ANY real-life incidents of nuclear waste causing things to grow?"

Shaun: "No."

Leigh: "Erm, Godzilla!"

Jason: *Laughing* "No, no, no. There's two KEY words there!"

*Leigh laughs*

MJ: "I took some nuclear Viagra once."

Jason: "And did it make a joke?"

MJ: "It made it green and glow!" *Laughs*

Jason: "Don't go near any Welshmen!"

Leigh: *Laughing* "They'll touch it!"

*EPISODE THREE GETS WATCHED*

Photo 3: At Jason's house.
MJ (with the DVD case), Shaun (with the sign) and Leigh.

MJ: "So there we go! End of Part Three and Jo is being menaced, from behind, by a maggot - that's not a euphemism!  That's actually what has happened!"

Shaun: "The Doctor was getting in the way of her sweet-sweet sex!"

MJ: "Yes, she - what was his name?  Is it David?  The Doctor?  Not The Doctor-Doctor, but -"

Shaun: "The Professor. Professor Jones."

MJ: "Yeah. Him and Jo had a little kiss - there was a moment there between them."

Shaun: "Not quite."

MJ: "Oh nearly - and The Doctor came in and said 'Shouldn't you be going to bed'!"

Jason: "And Shaun said he was c**t-blocking!"

Shaun: *Laughing* "I DID say that, yes!"

MJ: "Anything else? Oh yeah some guy's been killed - he'd run out of his usefulness -"

Shaun: "- Fell!"

Jason: "Yes!"

MJ: "Fell, yes. And he did - he fell!" *Laughs*

Shaun: "He was one of the administrators - and then he jumped off the building!"

Jason: "Maybe all the names mean something?"

MJ: "His mind was starting to come unravelled!"

Jason: "Fell fell."

MJ: "Yeah?"

Shaun: "I'm pretty sure his name was Guy."

Jason: "No!"

MJ: "He couldn't be hypnotised any more - his mind was getting scrabbled.  So they said 'Oh just get rid of him!'  So he was..."

Shaun: "But then the disembodied voice was enough to come back on the screen and be a dick to Stevens - who had just done it!" *Puts on voice of computer* "Oh you ARE sentimental!" *Normal voice* "Yes because he just killed a guy he'd worked with for forty years!!"

MJ: "Yeah the voice on the screen - is like on a computer monitor with a - what do you call that heart monitor thing?"

Jason: "Sound waves?"

MJ: "Yeah sound waves sort of thing!" *Does noise of a Transformer transforming*

Jason: "Yes, that's Soundwave."

MJ: *Laughing* "Anyway here's Jo getting menaced by a maggot!  Giggerty!"

*EPISODE FOUR GETS WATCHED*

Photo 4: At Jason's house. MJ (with the DVD case),
Shaun (going 'Ooo' with the sign) and a bored Leigh.

Leigh: *Reading credits* "Bruce Springstein!"

MJ: *Laughs* "Bruce Springstein was the BOSS!  Yeah well that was it - we just saw the end of it - "

Leigh: "Ted Danson??"

Jason: "Tony Danza!"

Shaun: "That's only the end of Episode Four?"

MJ: "End of Episode Four."

Shaun: *Laughing* "That would be a really crap ending if that's the end of it!"

MJ: "Yes, and the guy in charge of it all isn't a guy - it's a computer called 'BOSS'."

Shaun: "And Shaun is maintaining that this was clearly written for The Master and then he died and they had to re-work it!"

Jason: "Obviously!   He even stumbled and said 'I am the Mast - BOSS'!"

*Laughter*

MJ: "'I'm Marrrr-oss'!  'You're Moss'?  But Jo spilt some fungus on the, erm - "

Shaun: "- Green Death."

MJ: "- Green Death thing, by accident, and THAT has cured it!"

Shaun: "And we were all f**king shocked!"

MJ: "And The Doctor got into a place disguised as a Milkman and then a cleaning lady!" *Laughs*

Shaun: *Smiling* "Which is my favourite part of the entire affair so far! That was legitimately very funny!"

MJ: "Yes. It's been a while since we've seen him dressed up like that. I was probably thinking there would be more of it but there wasn't. So there we go. That's the end of Part Four." *Laughs*

Jason: "Yay..."

MJ: We'll talk about more later - go and have a fag and a tea... and I'm going to wee."

*Leigh laughs*

MJ: "Leigh just said, about the Professor Jones, Jo likes him because he's a Fun-Guy.... that's the joke - so there we go."

Jason: "Just to establish, Reader, he grows toadstools and stuff."

MJ: "He does."

Jason: "He collects spores."

MJ: "I don't know if I've already said, but they've kissed - or nearly kissed."

Jason: "They didn't kiss! They NEARLY kissed!"

MJ: "But Jo's clearly romantically interested in him.  And now I'm going to wee!  Next part!"

*BUT RECORDING RESUMES ON A CHAT*

Shaun: "This one doesn't feel like it's got a lot of filler."

MJ: "No, not so far.   As I was saying I've not watched it since I bought the DVD, many years ago, and I'm really enjoying it.   I obviously can't remember what happens in it.  So it's quite fun."

Shaun: "I think partly it's the fact that you've got the one main bad guy and like the other guys who are working with him aren't quite in on it.  So they're trying to uncover it in their own way."

MJ: "Yeah."

Shaun: "You've got UNIT working on their own, The Doctor working on his own - so it kind of keeps it interesting as you know people are figuring out different bits at different times.  Oh yeah, and you've got the scientist working on his own.   So it's got a lot of characters to bounce around, so it feels more fleshed-out."

MJ: "That's right."

Shaun: "Rather than them spending half of every episode being captured, getting out and being captured again!"

MJ: *Laughs* "Yes they've not been REALLY captured properly."

Shaun: "They were trapped in the mine, but they had a specific reason for that: the mine-cart was sabotaged.  That was fine.  Erm, got out of that and have been essentially free since."

MJ: "Yeah."

Shaun: "The Doctor was momentarily captured and then allowed out to see there was no cutting-equipment in the shed.... because they'd moved it to another shed!"

MJ: *Laughs* " 'See Doctor - we've got nothing to hide here' 'What about in THAT shed?' 'No, no, you can't go in that shed....'!"

Shaun: "Can't go in that shed! It's where I keep my porn."

MJ: "Good gracious!" *Laughs* "He breaks in and finds it's just pictures of The Master al over!"

*Laughter*

Shaun: "That would be the best!"

MJ: "Okay I will pause it now."

*EPISODE FIVE GETS WATCHED*

MJ: "End of Part Five and Zippy's been in it - I mean Roy Skelton!   Voice of The Daleks.  I thought I recognised his face!   He's got a lucky face!   And there he was in it going:" *Puts on Zippy voice* "Ohhhh, Geoffrey!!" *Normal voice* "So that's good for the readable text..."

*Leigh laughs*

Leigh: "Yeah your impressions are better when they're in text!"

*Laughter*

Jason: "It just says 'Zippy's voice'!"

MJ: *Normal voice* "'Arrr, arrr, arrr - I'm Roy Skelton' - I can do more of them!"

*Leigh laughs*

MJ: *Normal voice* "'Hello I'm Mike Yates'!"

Jason: "That's the ultimate episode of this thing."

Shaun: *Laughing* "The ULTIMATE episode??!"

Jason: "Yeah."

Leigh: "Yeah. Well the previous one was the PENultimate - so this MUST be the ultimate!"

MJ: "Ultimate!"

Shaun: *Laughing* "Mean's it's the best one!"

Leigh: "No, just the last!" *Laughs*

MJ: "Is that what 'Ultimate' means?"

Shaun: "Yeah."

MJ: "Because they, erm, they had 'Doctor Who - The Ultimate Adventure' which was a stage play and yet that wasn't the last one!"

Jason: "I remember that. It was Colin Baker - somebody told me he was the ultimate Doctor, at the time.  I found out what it meant when I looked it up."

*Shaun laughs*

MJ: "Anyway Part Six and Zippy's being hypnotised..."

*EPISODE SIX GETS WATCHED*

Photo 5: At Jason's house.
Ready for our close-up!

MJ (with the DVD case), Shaun (with the sign) and Leigh.

MJ: "And there we go. That was end and Jo's going to get married to the guy she met a few episodes ago and..." *Leigh chuckles*

Jason: "Yes. He spent most of it sick in bed."

*Leigh laughs*

MJ: "And the end of it ended with The Doctor driving off slowly in the sunset, quite sad."

Shaun: "One of the nice things about that is, it's certainly something they've played along with in later Doctor Who's, is just that he can see time in the future - with his insistence they go and get that gem and then him presenting it as the wedding gift at the end.  It suggests he already knew it was coming."

Jason: "Ahh I can see that."

MJ: "Mmm."

Shaun: "He knew their time was at an end. Which is pretty good."

Jason: "Maybe he thought 'This would be good for hypnotising people'."

Shaun: *Smiles* "Well yeah!   Obviously it also came in handy for that!"

Jason: "On her future husband for example!"

Shaun: "Yeah!" *Puts on hypnotising voice* "You will LEAVE the toilet seat DOWN!"

MJ: "The end of that had the guy who had - what was his name?"

Jason: "Which one are you talking about?"

MJ: "Who's in charge of 'WOTAN'!" *A joke - I know 'WOTAN' was the computer in Hartnell's 'The War Machines'!*

Shaun: "Stevens?"

MJ: *Laughs* "Stevens, yeah!  The computer went MAD at the end! It was brilliant!"

Shaun: "Yeah it was the feedback as they both had the same connection."

MJ: "Yeah he was singing 'La-la-la-la-laa!' and all that!   That was brilliant!"

*Leigh chuckles*

Jason: "I like a mad evil genius."

MJ: "And then he ended up fighting the machine making the whole - "

Jason: "Sacrificing himself."

MJ: "Sacrificing himself to blow up the whole thing."

Shaun: *Smiling* "AND everyone else in the building!   'Cos, although he told The Doctor to get them out, The Doctor got NO-ONE out!"

Jason: "I'm SURE the cleaning lady has left by now!"

MJ: "No, The Doctor WAS the cleaning lady!"

Shaun: "There were loads of other guys in suits in there that we kept seeing!!"

Leigh: "And the security people."

Shaun: "There were loads of people in there!!"

Leigh: "They all died."

Jason: "They all got eaten by maggots."

MJ: *Sagely* "Well, you know, perhaps it was their time." *Laughs*

Jason: "Probably."

MJ: "Ohh dear. So, erm, did you enjoy 'The Green Death'?"

Jason: "I enjoyed 'The Green Death' much more than I thought I was going to and I didn't think it was that bad to start with - apart from the dragonfly thing."

*Laughter*

Shaun: "To be fair we needed something really s**t in it!  Because other than that it all looked pretty okay."

*Leigh laughs*

Jason: "We had wobbly-lifts-action!"

MJ: "Yeah there was some dodgy green-screen but it's not..."

Shaun: "Yeah, we needed a crap prop!  It's not the same without a crap prop!"

Jason: "Yeah."

*Leigh laughs*

Shaun: "We got an incredibly crap prop!"

Jason: "We got a crap prop, which was dealt with in an incredibly crap fashion!"

*Laughter*

Shaun: "Yes!  Defeated by a coat!"

MJ: "Oh yes they threw a cloak over this fly and that stopped it.  It killed it!"

Shaun: "It killed it, yeah!"

Jason: "After a good five minutes of threatening!  Oh, coat!"

Shaun: "The thing is they seeded it for a couple of episodes before 'Ooo it's going to turn into a thing!'  'Oh I don't want to see what it turns into'!"

Leigh: "Yeah it could have been something awesome!"

Shaun: "But it turns into something unbelievably - like the f**king maggots could deflect bullets!!?" *Laughter* "This thing couldn't even deflect a coat!!"

*Laughter*

MJ: "Yeah! Ahhh."

Jason: "But, no, I thought it was well shot, for the time, good effects - apart from the maggot thing - no, not the maggot thing.  The FLY thing!  The characters were good - there's development. I thought the marriage thing came FAR too quickly."

Leigh: "Yeah."

Shaun: "Yeah but it always does."

MJ: "They didn't get married!"

Jason: "Well, he proposed!"

Shaun: "That was built a lot better than MOST of them."

MJ: "I think it was seeded through quite early on."

Jason: "Well, the love story was but not the marriage!"

Leigh: "They'd known each other for a week, perhaps!"

MJ: "That's right, yeah."

Jason: "They almost had a kiss and then he almost died!  Which may speed things up, I don't know, I've never done that..."

*Leigh chuckles*

Shaun: "Ahem!"

Jason: "Ahem?"

Shaun: "You say after a week of knowing each other the proposal is too soon - once again Steven was there for three hours and governing a f**king planet!!"

*Laughter*

Jason: "I'm not saying Steven's position was any better!" *Leigh laughs* "One crap idea does NOT mean the other one is NOT crap!"

Shaun: "It's more believable.  Look it got rid of Jo, who I was not keen on, okay - "

MJ: "- I was going to say about that!  We've - "

Shaun: "- That is the bottom line here!"

MJ: "We have lost Jo."

Jason: "I don't mind Jo!"

MJ: "Are you happy? Did you not warm to her more as it went on?"

Shaun: *Begrudgingly* "I warmed to her MORE as it went on, but I can't say I ever saw her as anything more than the thing that sometimes screams and gets captured."

Jason: "Oh you've never got over Liz Shaw, have you!?"

Shaun: "I HAVEN'T gotten over Liz Shaw - NOR have I forgiven Jo for replacing her - but that is BESIDES the point!  I don't like the young, dumb, girl side-kick thing.  I don't find them interesting!"

MJ: "I liked her and The Doctor's relationship.  How they were with each other.  It seemed quite natural - "

Jason: "- They had nice chats!"

MJ: "Nice chats and silliness and like -"

Shaun: "- Yeah! All that was fine! It's just the character archetype of 'damsel-in-distress who is infinitely dumber than The Doctor' I don't find interesting."

Jason: "Liz Shaw would NEVER have spilt the crap everywhere and saved the day!"

Shaun: "No!   She probably would have figured it out!! 'Get out the way, Professor! I'M the scientist here!'  Same with Barbara!"

MJ: "And Liz had a short skirt to do it with!  How about you Leigh?" *Laughs* "Did you like that one?"

Leigh: *Laughs* "Errr I don't feel as vehement about her as Shaun does, but I did think she was a bit poo."

MJ: "Ahh okay."

Shaun: "I like whatshername.  There was another girl we had after Dodo left, who was with the Sailor guy?"

MJ: "Oh, Polly!"

Shaun: "Polly."

Jason: "Oh yes.  She was good.  She took on the Highlanders!"

Shaun: "She did. Now she had a bit more, kind of, get-up-and-go and feist to her!  So she wasn't just -"

MJ: "- Spunk."

*Laughter*

Shaun: "Fine, she had spunk! But she wasn't just that small, very contained, little character that was there for nothing more than to just push the story on.  And yet she did have some nice moments."

Jason: "She did put the kettle on."

Shaun: "She DID put the kettle on."

Jason: "Several times."

Shaun: "And she had a cup of tea."

MJ: *Laughs* "And I think Susie (I meant Suky!) came along and took it off again!"

*Laughter*

Leigh: "This has degenerated into nonsense now!"

Shaun: "Yeah we're not even drinking in this one!"

MJ: "Yes, so that's the end of this series!  End of Jo Grant and so next time will be 'The Time Warrior'."

Jason: "Seen that."

Shaun: "How do you fight time?!  I mean a sword wouldn't be any good!  Unless it's a TIME sword!"

Jason: "Yes, like a Time Bandit, he's not STEALING time!"

Shaun: "I know... I was being silly!"

*Laughter*

Jason: "I'm think I'm deadly serious about this!"

MJ: *Laughing* "Yeah I don't think you're taking our Doctor Who meet-up as serious as you should!  Yeah Mark, where are you?!  Ill...."

Jason: "I don't see Mark doing a satellite link-up!  There's no Eurovision-style link-up this week!"

MJ: "There isn't!  I did enjoy that one."

Shaun: "That was quite good actually."

MJ: "So, okay, marks out of ten I guess?"

Jason: "I'm going to give it a nine."

Shaun: "Wow!"

Jason: "'Cos I'm feeling generous."

MJ: "Wow that IS generous!"

Jason: "Well, there's nothing really wrong with it - apart from jacket monster!"

MJ: "Leigh?"

Leigh: *Chuckling* "Erm, yeah I'm sort of with Jason, but not nine. Eight."

Jason: "Yeah but I've given a few eights this season."

MJ: "Shaun?"

Shaun: "Now that Roger Delgado is dead my taking a point off for The Master not being in it is no longer in effect." *Leigh laughs*

MJ: "That's good!"

Shaun: "And I'm going to give it a seven point six five eight three nine."

MJ: "Okay!"

Jason: "I think we had a good Master replacement, I'm sorry to say that."

Leigh: "Yes."

MJ: "Oh yeah!"

Jason: "Possibly two almost."

MJ: "And we had a guy that was Adam Chance from 'Crossroads'. That's always good!" *Laughs*

Jason: "He will BE Adam Chance!"

MJ: "He will be Adam Chance!  And I will give it - "

Shaun: "- A very enjoyable one!"

MJ: "- I think eight.  Yep.  I've seen a lot worse but I don't think it's a -"

Jason: "- I'll be very honest with you.  I was not looking forward to a six parter after coming back from work."

*Shaun laughs*

MJ: "Yes."

Jason: "That was fine."

MJ: "But let's see what 'The Book' says! Do you want me to read it?"

Jason: "Yeah."

Shaun: "NO!!!!"

*MJ laughs*

Leigh: "What's this!!?"

Shaun: "NO!!  I'm not okay with this!!" *Laughter* "Do not break protocol!!"

MJ: "Oh!! I was hoping to - "

Shaun: *Smiling* "We were on the phone the other week with him!  It MUST be Jason!!"

Jason: "I will allow you to take a photo of the pages though, instead of calling me up later and saying 'What was that you said, again?'" (I never did take the photos though!)

*Leigh laughs*

MJ: "That might be useful actually." *Long pause as Jason flicks through 'The Book'* "I mean if I HAD of been allowed to read it, I'd have done this quicker...."

Shaun: "What are we taking for guesses for maggot costumes?  I'm going with four!"

*Leigh laughs*

Jason: *Laughing* "Oh right! 'Maggot costumes'??!"

Shaun: "Oh, you know, the moveable maggots!"

Leigh: "I think there were only three toy maggots made!"

Jason: "No I'd go much higher - I think there was six!"

MJ: "I think there were quite a few."

Jason: "They always make six of everything!" *Shaun laughs* "I'll go at LEAST eleven! Eleven maggot costumes!"

MJ: "Made by Shawcroft, I should think!"

Jason: "BUT only four were able to move.  We'll go that."

MJ: "It'll say that people call it 'The One With The Giant Maggots' - that's what people always call it."

Jason: "Fifteen MILLION real-life maggots were used!"

MJ: "'The One With The Giant Maggots' - they don't ever say 'Green Death - The One Where Jo Leaves At The End' they go 'Oh -'"

Jason: *Cuts in and read from 'The Book'* " 'The Green Death. In Llanfairfach' -"

MJ: "- Same to you!"

Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "- 'pollution from 'Global Chemicals' is creating giant maggots and deadly slime. Dot dot dot. Og-lee-vee Colliery - "

Shaun: "- Ogilvie."

Jason: "Ogilvie. I don't know! I've never been there." *Reading from 'The Book'* "- 'Collery -"

Shaun: "- Colliery."

Jason: "Colliery." *Reads really slow* "Near... Gla...mor...gan.."

*Laughter*

Shaun: "Guys, I'm thinking I'm going to need to read this!" *Laughter* "Near Glamorgan!"

Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "- 'Stood in for the fictitious Llanfairfach Colliery.  The RCS International Factory in Brywnmawr, Powys -" *Jason and Leigh laugh* "- was used for 'Global Chemicals' - originally 'Universal Chemicals' ' - ooo!  They changed it!"

MJ: "Mm."

Jason: "It got smaller!"

*Leigh & Shaun laugh*

Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "'The maggots were a mixture of water-filled condoms, glove and' " *Shaun laughs loudly!*

MJ: "REALLY??!"

Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "- ' glove and rod puppets, static props pulled along on wires and live maggots on model sets.' You'd never know, would you?" *Leigh chuckles* " 'UNIT aerial bombs were lavatory ballcocks'." *Laughter* "'The unseen PM was named after liberal party leader Jeremy Thorpe."

MJ: "Ah."

Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "'Verdict: One of the very best UNIT stories, offering terrifying maggots, horrible green slime and very scary cliff-hangers.  There was also real character development and an attempt to address adult themes in an adult way.  Jo's departure is one of the series' saddest moments.  Ten out of ten'."

*"Ooo's" from the group*

Shaun: "Bloody Hell!"

MJ: "Blimey! 'The Book'!  Wow!"

Shaun: "So there's nothing about the sh*tness of the fly!?"

Jason: "No."

Leigh: "One sh*t fly was made for this!"

Shaun: "Yeah!"

Jason: "Twenty-five sh*t flies were made for this!"

Shaun: "I would immediately knock-off a point for the sh*t fly!" *Leigh laughs* "Ten out of ten means that it was literally perfect!"

Jason: "Can't do better than that!  Our last ten out of ten was, what?"

MJ: "Dunno."

Jason: "'Daleks' Master Plan' or something like that."

MJ: "Well that's....'The Book', you've stunned us there!"

Shaun: "Yes!"

MJ: "I mean I think it was very good -"

Shaun: "- An enjoyable one, yeah."

Jason: "Next week: Jo poses in 'Playboy'!"

Shaun: *Shaun chuckles* "Put THAT picture in the write-up!"

MJ: "I suppose it's nice for Mike Yates - who had his part bigged-up a bit this time, didn't he?  Playing a sort of spy and that."

Shaun: "Yes, quite a big role."

Jason: "That was good."

MJ: "Quite interesting to have him do that.  Err, UNIT didn't completely mess it up.  That's..."

Shaun: "I don't think a single UNIT person died this time."

Leigh: "I don't think they did!  No."

Shaun: "Which has GOT to be a first time ever."

Jason: "A lot just stood around, outside barriers, saying 'You can't go in'."

Shaun: "Well yeah."

Leigh: " 'We haven't got the same authority as a Milkman'!"

MJ: "Ah yes, Jon Pertwee had a couple disguises - that was nice."

Jason: "Oh yes! Of course!"

MJ: "The Milkman -"

Shaun: "- That was very funny -"

MJ: "- and the Cleaner Lady.  I'm sure he was a Cleaning Lady in something else, wasn't he?  A Charlady in something I'm sure?..."

Jason: "What, in 'Doctor Who'?"

MJ: "Yeah yeah!"

Jason: "Okay."

MJ: "Yeah - I don't just mean generally."

Shaun: "I think, erm, Trout-Man did that."

Jason: "Oh probably!"

Shaun: "He dressed as a woman."

MJ: "He did, in 'The Highlanders' I think he was err.... and he dressed as, like a, weird gypsy thing in 'The Underwater Menace'...  Anyway that's just babbling on about stuff like that!  But that's that!  So yay! 'Doctor Who' - and that was the end of the third season!  So we start a new season next time with 'The Time Warrior'. "

Jason: "The third season?"

MJ: "That was the end of the third season of Pertwee!  Sorry!"

Jason: "Okay."

MJ: "So that's me signing off!" *Starts singing the old fashioned 'Pick of The Pops' theme tune from BBC Radio* "And that's how the radio goes. Bye!"

*******************************************************************************************************

Lovely!  So that was another long one!  As I write this I have one more to write up...until tomorrow when we watch our next one!! Now rest for the nerdy!  Never mind here are the scores again!

Shaun: 7.65839

MJ: 8

Jason: 9

Leigh: 8

Which gives us an average of 8.1645975 out of 10!  High scores from us AND 'The Book'!  Well there we go, stay away from giant maggots and if you see toxic green slime on the ground....don't bloody go and touch it!!

Unless of course you want super powers.

Until next time, I shall return, yes I shall return....

MJ - 21/01/17