Hoozah! We had done it! Reached the end of Jon Pertwee's reign as Doctor Who! The longest serving Doctor, so far.... As it was a special occasion we all gathered together on a Saturday with booze! This is what happened when we met around Jason's for his second hosting of a Doctor Who finale....
The recording for this one was STUPIDLY long!
MJ: *To Jason as the DVD menu is starting* "Could you press 'Play' and 'Pause' straight away 'cos I don't want to see all these spoiler things! 'Cos I don't want to see how great, or not-great, the spider is!"
Leigh: "You're a spider!"
Mark: "Have you not watched this before?"
MJ: "I've never seen this - I only got this DVD this week!"
Mark: "Ahh so it's important we all talk loudly through all of it!"
Shaun: "Shall we all make a guess as to what stupid thing is going to kill him (The Doctor)?"
MJ: "So here we are around Jason's - it's 'Doctor Who - Nights'! We're going to watch the Pertwee final against Giant Haystacks! Who's gonna win!!?"
Leigh: "You're meant to be pausing it Jason!"
Jason: "It won't let me pause it! I'm waiting until it let's me do something to pause it!"
Leigh: *Laughing* "What sort of DVD doesn't let you pause it!?"
Jason: "Oh it takes, like, half and hour to pause! Right pressed it... there you go!"
Mark: "There you go."
*The DVD starts again and we all laugh*
MJ: "Jason's sh*t! He can't do his thing."
Jason: *Defensive* "Your DVD is sh*t! It works on every other DVD!"
MJ: "Well anyway I suppose we... I'll have a Waggle Dance!" (I was choosing an ale!)
Mark: "And what about your beer?"
*Mark and MJ 'Ahhhh' together and then laugh!*
MJ: "Yep, we're around Jason's with beer. We've got Jelly Babies, we've got crisps, we've got Shaun, Mark, Jason, Leigh, me - MJ."
Leigh: "Beer."
MJ: "Beer. We've got no extraneous people here. Gavin couldn't be here tonight but he sent this message:"
Shaun: "You people are f**king losers! Get lives!"
MJ: "That was Gav - Oh no I don't believe that was Gavin - unless at the end he says: 'I like trains'!"
Shaun: "I like trains!"
MJ: "There you go! That was Gavin!" *Mark and MJ laugh* "Hello Gavin if you are reading this! And yes, Pertwee - we're going to say goodbye to him! This is a six part story so we'd better..."
Jason: "Crack on."
MJ: Crack on, so here we go!"
Shaun: "Hey I want to play a game! Do you want to guess what ridiculous thing kills him?"
Jason: "I've seen it before!"
MJ: "I haven't!"
Shaun: *To Jason* "You don't get to guess!"
Leigh: "I think he trips over a brick."
Shaun: "Nice."
Mark: "I think he's suffocated by his own perm."
*Laughter*
Shaun: "I, of course, think that Sarah Jane Jessica Parker Fletcher turns out to be The Master in a cunning disguise, murders him - preferably with a sandwich, in a come-back to the sword fight they had previous!"
*Laughter*
MJ: "Ahh right and err..."
Leigh: *Laughing* "Let's see who's right!!"
Shaun: "Yes!"
Jason: "I'm right 'cos I've seen it before!"
MJ: "I think Aunt Sally (from 'Worzel Gummidge') suffocates him in a sexual asphyxiation thing!"
Mark: "We're all hoping for that one!"
Leigh: "Perhaps a Dalek kills him!"
Jason: "There's no Daleks in this one."
MJ: *Worzel Gummidge impression* "Ooo Aunt Sally! I can't breathe!! Get off me face Aunt Sally! Get off me face Aunt Sally! I'm dead....Aunt Sally!"
*Mark laughs*
Leigh: "Yeah it's called 'Planet Of The Spider Daleks'."
Shaun: "The SpiDaleks!"
Leigh: "The Spardeks."
MJ: *Stands* "I'm Spardeks!" *Laughter* "Okay, and we're off!" *Singing along with the titles*
"Doctor Whoooooo, Jon Per-twee!" *Normal voice* "Can you turn it up?"
*EPISODE ONE STARTS*
Leigh: *Laughing* "Can you close the curtains?!"
*MJ laughs*
Shaun: "Can you open the curtains again!?"
*Leigh laughs*
MJ: "Leigh said that was possibly the best bit of that episode where the guy at the end just disappeared."
MJ: "So that was the end of..." *Reading credits* "John Dearth - Oh did we see if it was, erm, whatshisface?... Gareth Hunt!! There you go! Arak. So there you go. Gareth Hunt, from the coffee commercial - another one for you kids(!) - was in that Episode Three."
MJ: "Episode Four we missed the ending because Leigh -" *Leigh laughs* "- was telling us a story about Dixon Bainbridge from 'The Mighty Boosh'! and now we don't know!"
Jason: "Not THAT big - apparently. Just bigger than your average spider."
Shaun: "The SpiDaleks!"
Leigh: "The Spardeks."
MJ: *Stands* "I'm Spardeks!" *Laughter* "Okay, and we're off!" *Singing along with the titles*
"Doctor Whoooooo, Jon Per-twee!" *Normal voice* "Can you turn it up?"
*EPISODE ONE STARTS*
Leigh: *Laughing* "Can you close the curtains?!"
*MJ laughs*
Shaun: "Can you open the curtains again!?"
*Leigh laughs*
Jason: "It's dark out anyway!"
Shaun: "It's dark enough!"
MJ: "Here stick this next to you." *MJ hands Shaun a sign which he made for Shaun*
Shaun: "I love this!"
MJ: "I'm glad, I'm glad."
Shaun: "I might just wear this as if it's my t-shirt!"
MJ: "Oh yeah I did Shaun a sign of him as The Master."
Shaun: "And I love it."
MJ: *Looking on screen* "Is that Mike Yates?"
Jason: "That is Mike Yates."
Shaun: "Yates is dead!"
MJ: "No, no he was disgraced!"
Leigh: "He was arrested and put in prison."
MJ: "And now he's hanging around with cows."
Jason: "Disgraced and now he's turning it all around."
Mark: "He was dismissed."
Shaun: "Oh I thought they killed him off. Oh I paid SO much attention!"
MJ: "And there we go, Part One."
*EPISODE ONE GETS WATCHED*
Photo 1: At Jason's house.
Jason, Leigh (with furry friend),
Jason, Leigh (with furry friend),
Mark (with DVD case) and MJ (with Shaun's Master sign)!
MJ: "End of Part One and there's lots of 'Om-ing'" *Leigh laughs* "- and the blue crystal's been returned by Jo Grant from the Amazon. And there's a -"
Shaun: "- Mike Yates!"
MJ: "Mike Yates has returned."
Jason: "It's all tying into previous things - it's coming together."
MJ: "And there's some sort of retreat where people are, like, 'Om-ing'. A monk kind of thing but they're not monks."
Shaun: "They're acting OM-inously!"
MJ: "Ominous, yes. At the end a spider appeared which, you know, for 'Planet Of The Spiders'.... yeah."
Jason: "On a board game."
MJ: "On a board game, yes! And there's a guy in charge who's probably Tibetan. Except it's not, it's probably some white guy made a bit orange."
Mark: "Yes."
MJ: "And his eyes are a bit stretched. Anyway, Part Two!"
*EPISODE TWO GETS WATCHED*
Photo 2: At Jason's house.
Jason (Behind the sign), Leigh,
Mark (with DVD case) and Shaun (with his Master sign)!
MJ: "Leigh said that was possibly the best bit of that episode where the guy at the end just disappeared."
Shaun: *Laughing* "The spider said 'Just trust me, I'll make you invisible' basically!"
Leigh: "I didn't hear the spider say that!"
MJ: "We just had an incredibly long car chase, where the guy who had stolen The Doctor's blue crystal had - "
Shaun: "Yeah!"
Leigh: "A hovercraft, a gyrocopter..."
MJ: "Gyrocopter, hovercraft, various cars, err -"
Jason: "Bessie."
MJ: "Bessie."
Shaun: "Space hopper! That was my favourite bit!"
MJ: *Laughs* "Hah! Space hopper!"
Shaun: "SPA-ACE hopper!"
MJ: "So he (Lupton - a human who was planning to take to get lots of power with the help of an alien spider - from a planet where spiders were in charge and could speak and think and all that stuff!) stole The Doctor's.... which one did he steal? Bessie was it? Yeah he stole Bessie."
Leigh: "No he stole The Whomobile."
MJ: "Ahh he stole the Whomobile, so The Doctor got in Bessie and the Brigadier -"
Jason: "Lupton stole the gyrocopter, then he stole a boat and he had the options to steal a hovercraft - idiot!"
Leigh: "After killing Geoff Hovercraft - inventor of the hovercraft!"
Shaun: "So in the next one he's going to have to steal a train."
Jason: "Oh I hope so!"
Shaun: "A plane - another automobile!"
*Jason laughs*
Jason: "A tricycle!"
MJ: "I look forward to the scene where the Brigdier looks over to The Doctor and he's a devil and goes 'Hahahahaha!!' And that's my favourite scene..."
Shaun: *Confused* "What??!"
MJ: "From 'Planes, Trains and Automobiles'. When they go through the tunnel."
Shaun: "Oh!"
*Mark chuckles*
MJ: "Oh no! It was between two trucks, wasn't it!?" *Leigh laughs* "Anyway so that's two episodes in and erm -"
Jason: "- What's happened so far!?"
Shaun: "F**k all!"
Jason: "A gem's been stolen. Mike Yates has gone in and out of a building."
Mark: "No, a spider's turned up. Has gone invisible. Is now sarcastically guiding a Badger Man around."
Shaun: *Laughing* "Yeah! I am enjoying the sarcasm of the spider! I'll grant it that!"
Mark: "The Badger Man/Spider combo has stolen the blue gem -"
Shaun: "- All I'm saying, right, is THIS is not living up to my expectations of the thing that had to replace 'The Final Game' - or whatever it would be. The big Doctor Who/Master big blow-out thing that they'd written and didn't get made."
Jason: "I thought you meant 'The Final Game' as in -"
MJ: "- Sherlock Holmes?"
Jason: "- the patterned floor (from 'Death To The Daleks')."
Shaun: *Laughs* "Oh God no! To be fair the patterned floor was slightly more interesting cliffhanger than that!"
MJ: "I think I've said this before, I'm sure the spider voice we're hearing is Roger Delgado's widow. Her name is Kismet or something?"
Jason: "Kismet Delgado?"
Shaun: "That's what I would say if to him if he was still alive! 'You're my favourite Master - Kismet, Delgado'!"
*Mark laughs*
MJ: "Can you play the DVD on a little bit so we can see if it is indeed?" (It was paused)
Shaun: "No because he'll stop the f**king DVD again and eject it into the sun!" *Laughs*
MJ: "Okay."
Mark: *Laughing* "Eject it into the sun!?!"
Shaun: *Laughing* "He will eject it into the sun!!"
*Mark laughs*
Shaun: *Reading end credits* "John Dearth - that's a good name!"
Leigh: "Geoff Hovercraft?"
Jason: *Reading end credits* "Who's called 'Land'?!"
MJ: *Reading end credits* "Chubby Oates!! That's a good name for a Policeman!!"
*Laughter*
Jason: *Reading end credits* "Stuart Fell."
MJ: *Reading end credits* "Kismet Delgado!!" (I pronounce it 'Kis-may')
Shaun: "There you go! It's Kismet!" (He says 'Kis-met')
MJ: "Oh I don't know how you say it!"
Jason: "Depends where you are from!"
Leigh: "Who's Kismet Delgado?"
MJ: "Roger Delgado's widow - at this point. And it's also what Nelson didn't say when he was dying!"
Leigh: "Kis-met, Delgado!"
MJ: *Laughs* "Yayy! On that I'm going to pause it!"
*RECORDING GETS PAUSED BUT THEN RESUMED*
MJ: "Leigh has just pointed out that Ysanne Churchman, who is doing one of the spider voices, also did the voice of Alpha Centuri! So Leigh DOES pay attention!" *Laughs*
Mark: "Only to the giant penisis."
MJ: *Laughing* "And Spider ladies!" *Shaun makes some high squeaky noises* "For the benefit of that tape: I have no idea what he was doing!!" *Leigh laughs* "But it was high pitched! Anyway, Part Three!"
*EPISODE THREE GETS WATCHED*
Photo 3: At Jason's house.
Jason (with the sign), Leigh (with furry friend),
Mark (with DVD case) and MJ (with Shaun's Master sign)!
MJ: "So that was the end of..." *Reading credits* "John Dearth - Oh did we see if it was, erm, whatshisface?... Gareth Hunt!! There you go! Arak. So there you go. Gareth Hunt, from the coffee commercial - another one for you kids(!) - was in that Episode Three."
Shaun: "Yeah, and ME who's the same age as most of you! I don't get it!"
MJ: "Yeah."
Shaun: "Or why you'd know his -" *Reading credits* "Oh my God! There are f**king three spiders names now!! It's ridiculous!"
MJ: "Yeah the coffee commercials where they did this with the beans:" *Shows suggestive hand shake as they did on the adverts* "Nescafe - and then they shook their hand - doing the w**ker sign with the beans."
Mark: "Yeah."
MJ: "And he was also in 'The New Avengers' with Joanna Lumley."
Shaun: "I remember that Joanna Lumley was in 'The New Avengers' but I don't think I ever saw an episode of it. (I don't think I have either!) I've seen many episodes of the original 'Avengers' and I like that!"
MJ: "Oh they're on the Planet of the Spiders now, by the way. The Spiders are in charge of the people."
*EPISODE FOUR STARTS*
*Leigh gets up to go to the toilet*
Shaun: "Jason, quickly got back to the main menu - I mean pause it!"
Leigh: "Don't pause it!"
MJ: "No don't pause it - but it's too late he has paused it!"
Leigh: "You're going to break it though and we're going to have to watch Episode One again and AGAIN!"
Shaun: "I quite like the fact that Jason is sitting through this again after having watched it once already. I have to be honest I'm not thinking this is great."
MJ: "Oh! I'm quite enjoying this one! But there you go!"
Shaun: "I know MJ, but you quite enjoy ALL of them!"
MJ: "Yeah. No -"
Shaun: *Smiling* "- It's like me with the Batman comic. If it's mostly sh*t I'll probably enjoy it!"
MJ: "Yeah. That's true. Yeah. But I've not seen it myself before, so it's quite fun."
Leigh: "YOU haven't seen yourself before!"
MJ: "I HAVE seen myself! I don't trust myself."
Leigh: *Referencing the flashback on screen* "Seen this bit!"
*Someone on screen says 'Stop!'*
MJ: "Hammer Time!"
Shaun: "No one said that last time! I was quite oddly disappointed in the entire group!"
Jason: "What did we not say?"
MJ: "Stop, Hammer Time."
Jason: "That was my other option. I was going to wait for another 'Stop' - there's various 'Stops'."
MJ: "In the name of love?"
Jason: "That's another on. Stop, look, listen - is one. I can't think of any more - there was loads!" *Laughter* "But 'Hammer Time' was my second one to go to!"
MJ: "Okay, Part Four."
*EPISODE FOUR GETS WATCHED*
Photo 4: At Jason's house.
Jason (with DVD case), Leigh (with furry friend and sign),
Mark and Shaun (with his Master sign)!
MJ: "Episode Four we missed the ending because Leigh -" *Leigh laughs* "- was telling us a story about Dixon Bainbridge from 'The Mighty Boosh'! and now we don't know!"
Leigh: "It wasn't even a story! I was just saying the old man reminded me of him!"
MJ: "So hopefully I'll see it in the recap."
Shaun: "Was he, whatisname? Matt Berry?"
MJ: "Yeah."
Leigh: "Yeah."
Jason: *Reading end credits* "Maureen Morris? Any relation, Leigh?"
Leigh: "Maureen Morris? Yeah she was my famous Aunt Eight-Legs!"
Shaun: "Every one's got a family!"
MJ: "So yes, as we were just saying before, the spiders on there -"
Leigh: "- Eight-Legs!!"
MJ: "- Eight-Legs, came to this planet as a normal spider -"
Leigh: "- Eight-Legs!!"
MJ: "- With the humans -"
Leigh: "- Two-Legs!!"
MJ: "- And they fell on the crystals, the blue crystals -"
Leigh & Shaun: "- No-Legs!!"
MJ: "- And then grew to be BIG Eight-Legs!"
*Leigh laughs*
Jason: "Not THAT big - apparently. Just bigger than your average spider."
Leigh: "Eight-Legs!!"
Shaun: "I was expecting one spider like the one from the end of 'It' - preferably with a big glowing 'Throw rock here to die' section."
MJ: "Oh I haven't seen it."
Jason: "Wait until we get to the end of this!!"
MJ: "Oh and also Sarah Jane's been bound up in web next to some other guy who's quite breezy about dying! 'NO, no point struggling, you're going to die!'"
MJ: "That was the cliff-hanger of Episode Five and Tommy, who's now intelligent -"
Mark: "- And plays a mean pinball."
Jason: "And various haircuts."
Shaun: "Yes, various terrible haircuts."
MJ: "And The Doctor has met the guy in charge who's a -"
Leigh: *Reading end credits* "- Robert Sloman."
MJ: "No he's not! He's a Tibetan monk."
Shaun: "Who delightfully kept saying 'You knowing of our ways and our tongue and our customs' whilst speaking in the most British accent in the world!" *Laughs*
MJ: "Yeah. I BET he knows his tongue..."
Mark: "And looks like the old man with a bird on his head in 'Labyrinth'."
MJ: "There are actually some guys from a Tom Baker story who have birds on their heads, so..."
Shaun: "I'll look forward to that to make the same joke!"
MJ: "Well actually I think their head gear is more like a bird than..."
Shuan: "Ah! Is it as impressive as Kronos the bird!?"
MJ: "I don't think ANYTHING will be as impressive as that! So this is Part Six?"
Jason: "Yes."
MJ: "Of the FINAL Pertwee. Ooooo! Except for 'The Five Doctors' (And of course 'Dimensions In Time'! Don't laugh! It counts! The Brig finally meets The Sixth Doctor in it, so it counts!)."
Shaun: "Before you turn off the recorder you need to say 'Pert Wee' as though you're talking about his erect penis. You've not done that yet."
Jason: *Laughing* "He does it all the time!!?"
Shaun: "Yeah he's not done it today!!"
MJ: "Pert wee."
Mark: "Yeah there we go."
*Leigh holds up his mobile to show a photo he was looking for - followed by much laughter*
MJ: "Well there we go! Wow! Leigh is holding up a photo of the guy from the film 'Labyrinth' who looks exactly like the Tibetan Abbot man! Part Six."
Mark: "What was the point of the guy that died at the start, with the bow-tie?"
MJ: *Joking* "What, The Doctor!?"
Leigh: "Oh no that was in Episode One! Which was pointless!"
Shaun: "Yes! But that was pointing out the psychic powers!"
Leigh: "It was to show the Two-Legs have psychic powers."
Mark: "Okay."
Shaun: "Right all of the people, in the little coven thing, were using the psychic powers that are dormant in normal people, right?"
Shaun: "No he was fine."
Leigh: "What, Tommy Two-Legs!?"
*Laughter*
Shaun: "I agree, but it never really got above average."
Mark: "It wasn't great!"
*Laughter*
Leigh: "Sorry, what??! Who was Bradley Walsh in??!"
Leigh: "I'm in the room!"
Jason: "You're practically in the room!"
Mark: "Sound like you're in the room!"
Shaun: *Comes back in* "I'm in the room!"
Jason: "You were louder than we are - Matt Berry!" *Leigh chuckles* "What did I give the last one?"
MJ: "I don't know - I haven't got it here!"
Jason: "Pffff! What did I give 'Death to The Daleks'? That's on audio, that's on Facebook."
MJ: *Confused* "Ye-ur-yeah..."
*Leigh laughs loudly*
Jason: "I'm going to give this a six point two nine. I dunno."
MJ: "Yep! You thought that was okay - in the middle, above average. So are you disappointed for this being the last story? You think it should have been a lot better?"
Jason: "There was nothing wrong with it, I tend to enjoy them more when I'm drunk!"
Leigh: 'I DO enjoy them more when I'm drunk! But also I think that, apart from the first two episodes, it was quite good."
MJ: "Yeah!"
Leigh: "It got better and better as it went along I think."
Shaun: "Yeah, but I like the whole thing around it."
Jason: "The staircase?! The nightmare set?!"
Shaun: "The crystally-death thing. Which, again, The Doctor could have pumped it in and avoided his own death."
Jason: "Shoot it!"
Shaun: *Laughing* "Okay! There it's shot. Done!" *Laughing* "There's nothing more to do.... Ooo, bullets!"
*Leigh laughs*
MJ: "'Robot' is Tom Baker's first one. Okay, see you next time - bye!"
********************************************************************************************************
Leigh: "Dixon Bainbridge!"
Shaun: "Dixon Bainbridge."
Leigh: "The Two-Legs."
MJ: *Puts on Matt Berry voice* "We're going to die! And I'm doing a different acting style than I have ever done and ever will do!!"
*Laughter*
Shaun: "God bless Matt Berry and all who sail in him!"
Jason: "Oh and Benny (he means Tommy) got intelligent."
MJ: "Oh yes the simpleton (who we called 'Benny' after the simple character from the soap opera 'Crossroads') got intelligent by playing with the crystal. So Shaun's not enjoying it so far."
Shaun: "I'm absolutely loving the idea of going home - what are you talking about!?"
*Laughter*
MJ: "How about you, Mark?"
Mark: "Erm, I think we've seen worse ones?"
Jason: "To be fair there's a lot going on! There is plot - I mean it's taking ages to get to it!
But it's there! There's more happening in this than some episodes!"
MJ: "Yeah."
Mark: "I find the West Country hippies distracting!"
MJ: "West Country Hippies? Good band!"
Jason: "What they are doing is an amalgam of all the episodes we've ever had. We're just got puppet monsters, we've got Yokels - natives - you've got to have them! We've had Pigbin Josh (no we haven't!). We've had a chase. It's like a best of Doctor Who!"
Mark: "There has been a lot going on, to be fair."
MJ: "Oh yeah yeah! The big chase scene seemed like a different story!"
Shaun: "It has a Delgado!"
Jason: "Yes, you've gotta have a Delgado."
Leigh: "Albeit not Roger."
Shaun: "Albeit not the best Delgado! But there is at least A Delgado in!"
MJ: "Erm, anything to say, Leigh?"
Leigh: "Erm, no. This Two-Legs has no opinion on it."
*Laughter*
Shaun: "I want Ysanne Churchman to be done the higher voice!"
Leigh: "Mmm!"
MJ: "Yes!"
Shaun: *High voice* "I'm an evil spider!"
MJ: *High voice* "I've got eight legs!"
Shaun: *High voice* "I'm going to eat your brains! Stupid Two-Legs!" *Normal voice* "I can't do the voice as well as Leigh does and it really bugs me!! I want to do it better!"
MJ: "Ahhh so there we go! And Maureen Morris - Leigh's Aunty - she's in it!"
*Shaun laughs*
Leigh: "My eight legged Aunty!"
MJ: *Laughing* "Eight legged Spider Aunty!" *Sings to the tune of 'Spider Man'* "Spider Aunty, Spider Aunty!" *Laughs* "And pause!"
*EPISODE FIVE GETS WATCHED*
Photo 5: At Jason's house.
Jason (with eyes closed and sign), Leigh (cross-eyed with furry friend),
Mark (with eyes open and DVD case)
and MJ (with Shaun's Master sign)!
MJ: "That was the cliff-hanger of Episode Five and Tommy, who's now intelligent -"
Mark: "- And plays a mean pinball."
*Shaun laughs*
MJ: *Laughs* "Yes and plays a mean pinball - ever since he was a young boy. Err, he's being attacked by about three or four guys with lightning hands."
Shaun: "Including Moss!"
MJ: *Laughs* "Yes and plays a mean pinball - ever since he was a young boy. Err, he's being attacked by about three or four guys with lightning hands."
Shaun: "Including Moss!"
Jason: "And various haircuts."
Shaun: "Yes, various terrible haircuts."
MJ: "And The Doctor has met the guy in charge who's a -"
Leigh: *Reading end credits* "- Robert Sloman."
MJ: "No he's not! He's a Tibetan monk."
Shaun: "Who delightfully kept saying 'You knowing of our ways and our tongue and our customs' whilst speaking in the most British accent in the world!" *Laughs*
MJ: "Yeah. I BET he knows his tongue..."
Mark: "And looks like the old man with a bird on his head in 'Labyrinth'."
MJ: "There are actually some guys from a Tom Baker story who have birds on their heads, so..."
Shaun: "I'll look forward to that to make the same joke!"
MJ: "Well actually I think their head gear is more like a bird than..."
Shuan: "Ah! Is it as impressive as Kronos the bird!?"
MJ: "I don't think ANYTHING will be as impressive as that! So this is Part Six?"
Jason: "Yes."
MJ: "Of the FINAL Pertwee. Ooooo! Except for 'The Five Doctors' (And of course 'Dimensions In Time'! Don't laugh! It counts! The Brig finally meets The Sixth Doctor in it, so it counts!)."
Shaun: "Before you turn off the recorder you need to say 'Pert Wee' as though you're talking about his erect penis. You've not done that yet."
Jason: *Laughing* "He does it all the time!!?"
Shaun: "Yeah he's not done it today!!"
MJ: "Pert wee."
Mark: "Yeah there we go."
*Leigh holds up his mobile to show a photo he was looking for - followed by much laughter*
MJ: "Well there we go! Wow! Leigh is holding up a photo of the guy from the film 'Labyrinth' who looks exactly like the Tibetan Abbot man! Part Six."
*EPISODE SIX GETS WATCHED*
MJ: "Ahh there you go! That was the end of 'Planet Of The Spiders' and the end of Pertwee! Don't you think that was the most un-glamorous regeneration? It was just like: Oh. There we go!"
Jason: "Compared to? Well, Troughton didn't have a great one."
Shaun: "Troughton's was fine."
Jason: "'I don't want to go'." (Erm, that was David Tennant!)
MJ: "Yeah but we didn't see his - it was off screen."
Jason: "Hartnell's was 'Oh I've just fell over'!"
MJ: "Yeah but they did all that *makes whooshing noise* weird effects and stuff."
Shaun: "Yeah they did a special effect over the camera."
MJ: "THAT (Pertwee) they just changed him and he just faded to..."
Shaun: "And again it was predicated largely by a racial stereotype."
Jason: "That was BASICALLY the same as the Troughton one."
*Mark laughs*
Shaun: "NO! They whited out the screen with the Troughton one!" (Well, it faded to black - Hartnell's was whited out)
MJ: "They did!"
Jason: "Not on purpose."
Shaun: *Laughing* "'Not on purpose'."
Jason: "That's just 'cos they couldn't do anything else in black and white!"
Shaun: "Yeah! And it still looked BETTER than THAT!"
MJ: "Yeah well that was - well for him being (at that time) the longest serving Doctor you want something a bit more fancy than 'That'll do! Knock off now'!"
Shaun: "You say it like that's impressive! He didn't do THAT much longer than any of the others!"
MJ: "He did!"
Leigh: "Are you saying Whatisface, Pertwee, was the longest serving Doctor?"
Shaun: "Yeah."
Jason: "So far."
MJ: "Yeah at THAT point."
Leigh: *Laughing whilst annoyed* "Oh at THAT point!!?"
MJ: "Yeah!"
Shaun: "Yeah! The first guy did, like, three years (roughly two years and eleven months), the second guy did two years (roughly two years and seven months) and then Pertwee did three and a half years (actually he did roughly four years and five months)."
MJ: "So how did we finish? The Doctor went back to?"
Leigh: "Right! I think that the first two episodes were entirely superfluous, I don't see any point to those."
Shaun: "I actually think - I still maintain, right -"
Leigh: "- But it got better as it went on!"
Shaun: *Laughs and continues* "- that the guy trying to take over the world would have sufficed - two minutes of plot would have sufficed for that!"
Jason: "I think that they think 'We've got six weeks left, what can we fill this with? This various story'."
Photo 6: At Jason's house.
Leigh (with the sign) and
Mark (with eyes closed!).
MJ: "Ahh there you go! That was the end of 'Planet Of The Spiders' and the end of Pertwee! Don't you think that was the most un-glamorous regeneration? It was just like: Oh. There we go!"
Jason: "Compared to? Well, Troughton didn't have a great one."
Shaun: "Troughton's was fine."
Jason: "'I don't want to go'." (Erm, that was David Tennant!)
MJ: "Yeah but we didn't see his - it was off screen."
Jason: "Hartnell's was 'Oh I've just fell over'!"
MJ: "Yeah but they did all that *makes whooshing noise* weird effects and stuff."
Shaun: "Yeah they did a special effect over the camera."
MJ: "THAT (Pertwee) they just changed him and he just faded to..."
Shaun: "And again it was predicated largely by a racial stereotype."
Jason: "That was BASICALLY the same as the Troughton one."
*Mark laughs*
Shaun: "NO! They whited out the screen with the Troughton one!" (Well, it faded to black - Hartnell's was whited out)
MJ: "They did!"
Jason: "Not on purpose."
Shaun: *Laughing* "'Not on purpose'."
Jason: "That's just 'cos they couldn't do anything else in black and white!"
Shaun: "Yeah! And it still looked BETTER than THAT!"
MJ: "Yeah well that was - well for him being (at that time) the longest serving Doctor you want something a bit more fancy than 'That'll do! Knock off now'!"
Shaun: "You say it like that's impressive! He didn't do THAT much longer than any of the others!"
MJ: "He did!"
Leigh: "Are you saying Whatisface, Pertwee, was the longest serving Doctor?"
Shaun: "Yeah."
Jason: "So far."
MJ: "Yeah at THAT point."
Leigh: *Laughing whilst annoyed* "Oh at THAT point!!?"
MJ: "Yeah!"
Shaun: "Yeah! The first guy did, like, three years (roughly two years and eleven months), the second guy did two years (roughly two years and seven months) and then Pertwee did three and a half years (actually he did roughly four years and five months)."
MJ: "So how did we finish? The Doctor went back to?"
Leigh: "Right! I think that the first two episodes were entirely superfluous, I don't see any point to those."
Shaun: "I actually think - I still maintain, right -"
Leigh: "- But it got better as it went on!"
Shaun: *Laughs and continues* "- that the guy trying to take over the world would have sufficed - two minutes of plot would have sufficed for that!"
Jason: "I think that they think 'We've got six weeks left, what can we fill this with? This various story'."
Mark: "What was the point of the guy that died at the start, with the bow-tie?"
MJ: *Joking* "What, The Doctor!?"
Leigh: "Oh no that was in Episode One! Which was pointless!"
Shaun: "Yes! But that was pointing out the psychic powers!"
Leigh: "It was to show the Two-Legs have psychic powers."
Mark: "Okay."
Shaun: "Right all of the people, in the little coven thing, were using the psychic powers that are dormant in normal people, right?"
Mark: "Yeah."
Shaun: "THAT guy had heightened powers, which is why the crystal affected him more, etc, etc, etc."
Leigh: "I'm confused by the use of this word 'People'?"
Shaun: *Smiling* "Oh sorry: Two Legs!"
Leigh: "Oh right!"
*Laughing*
MJ: " So it concluded that The Doctor went back to the planet of the spiders -"
Leigh: "- Eight legs!"
MJ: "- Because he had to - he was told he had to."
Jason: "What happened to Tommy?! What happened to that cliff-hanger?! Did he die??"
Mark: "Tommy died."
MJ: "Did he die?"
Jason: "I don't know they dragged that cliff-hanger out for another episode!"
MJ: "No, I thought he just got knocked out?"
Shaun: "No he was fine."
Leigh: "What, Tommy Two-Legs!?"
*Laughter*
MJ: "That famous Music-hall comedian!" *Puts on cheeky Cockney voice* "'Allo there Missus! Tommy Two-Legs 'ere'!" *Shaun plays a 'Coming Soon' feature on the DVD - which shows The Master* "Oh you're just playing this so you can see The Master!"
Shaun: "I miss The Master! I might give this an extra point for seeing The Master in a DVD Extra's scene, 'cos I've got to be honest - that ain't getting high marks!"
Leigh: "I think episodes, err, three, four, five and six were all fine!"
MJ: "Yeah!"
Leigh: "I thought it got better and better as it went along!"
Jason: "There was some good stuff!"
Shaun: "I agree, but it never really got above average."
Jason: "The chase wasn't BAD!"
Shaun: "I liked the last bit."
Mark: "It wasn't great!"
Jason: "It was fine."
MJ: "I'm used to 'The Chase' how it is now, with Bradley Walsh..."
*Laughter*
Leigh: "Sorry, what??! Who was Bradley Walsh in??!"
Jason: "He's in (quiz show) 'The Chase'. Anyway I don't know what I felt! I think it's okay. So I can give you a score now?"
MJ: "Okay, what would you mark it out of ten then?"
Shaun: "A-a-a-a-a!!! What you doing? Marking it whilst we're out of the room!" (oh yeah Shaun was outside smoking!)
Leigh: "I'm in the room!"
Jason: "You're practically in the room!"
Mark: "Sound like you're in the room!"
Shaun: *Comes back in* "I'm in the room!"
Jason: "You were louder than we are - Matt Berry!" *Leigh chuckles* "What did I give the last one?"
MJ: "I don't know - I haven't got it here!"
Jason: "Pffff! What did I give 'Death to The Daleks'? That's on audio, that's on Facebook."
MJ: *Confused* "Ye-ur-yeah..."
*Leigh laughs loudly*
Jason: "I'm going to give this a six point two nine. I dunno."
MJ: "Yep! You thought that was okay - in the middle, above average. So are you disappointed for this being the last story? You think it should have been a lot better?"
Shaun: "Yes, it should have been a lot better."
Jason: "There was nothing wrong with it, I tend to enjoy them more when I'm drunk!"
Leigh: 'I DO enjoy them more when I'm drunk! But also I think that, apart from the first two episodes, it was quite good."
MJ: "Yeah!"
Leigh: "It got better and better as it went along I think."
Jason: "I don't think there's anything wrong with the first two episodes, I just think they were superfluous!" *Laughs*
Leigh: "They WERE superfluous! ENTIRELY pointless!!"
MJ: "Did you like the spiders at all?"
Leigh: "Yes! I DID like the spiders!"
Mark: "I like the spiders on the people's backs. It was creepy."
Shaun: "I liked the big spider at the end that was like Zuul."
Shaun: "I liked the big spider at the end that was like Zuul."
Jason: "It was the same spider just shot bigger!!"
Shaun: "Yeah, but I like the whole thing around it."
Jason: "The staircase?! The nightmare set?!"
Shaun: "The crystally-death thing. Which, again, The Doctor could have pumped it in and avoided his own death."
MJ: "I like that the spiders were all hysterical women - which was fun!" *Laughs*
Mark: "He had to face his own fear (of spiders)."
Shaun: *Ranting* "He didn't have to face his own fear!! He had no fear of the f**king spiders!!"
Jason: "He did."
Shaun: "He didn't!
Mark: "He did! The whole serial he was scared of 'The Great One'." (The big ruling spider)
*Mark and Shaun argue a lot more which I can't make out whilst Jason talks*
Jason: "I liked the natives. I always like a native. I like a bureaucracy argument. I like it when there's a bit of mutiny amongst the people - not paperwork, you know."
MJ: "Yeah."
Jason: "The spiders were getting a bit bitchy with each other."
MJ: "They were, yeah!"
Jason: "I like Sarah Jane Smith getting taken over by a spider, which we didn't know!"
MJ: "Oh yeah yeah yeah! 'Cos they had invisible spiders on their back."
Jason: "Yeah."
Leigh: "That made Sarah Jane Smith actually vaguely interesting for a moment."
*MJ laughs - Mark and Shaun are still squabbling!*
Jason: "She's always interesting!"
Leigh: "Don't like her."
Jason: "I liked Tommy. Tommy was good. Nobody explained why he was there in the first place and what happened to him in the end."
Leigh: "He was a bit pointless."
Jason: "But I liked him becoming brainy."
MJ: "Yeah. I quite liked his sweet character. It was something different. Just someone who had to hang around doing odd-jobs and lifting things. Good old Mongo!" (Mongo was a simple character from the comedy Western film 'Blazing Saddles')
Jason: "Was he paid a good wage though? Or did they take advantage of him?"
Leigh: "I'll give it eight legs."
*Laughter*
Jason: "Out of?"
Leigh: "Eight legs."
Jason: "Wow, good score!"
MJ: "Errr what about you, Mark?"
Mark: *Having stopped squabbling for a short while now* "Erm, I will give it eleven legs."
MJ: *Bemused* "Out of ten?"
Mark: "Yes. Because he's dead!! Dead at last!!!"
*MJ sniggers*
Jason: "That's the bit you like best is it?"
Mark: "No more Pertwee!!"
*Laughter*
MJ: "No no, give me a proper score!" *Leigh laughs* "Compared to the others - you can't just score your relief!"
Shaun: "He's turned it up to eleven....legs!"
Mark: "I've turned it up to eleven. I'm happy he's dead."
*Laughter*
MJ: "Shaun?"
Shaun: *Smiling* "I, now, I'm really glad I didn't like that one. Because there's a reason for this, which is: me and Mark made the decision to give ridiculous point scores, after the actual number, which I decided I was only going to do for Pertwee."
MJ: "Oh okay."
Shaun: *Smiling* "And I really wanted to dislike that so I could give it the score that I'm going to give it, right." *Laughs* "And make you write ALL of this out and it be a thing!"
Mark: "Are you giving him Pi?"
Shaun: *Laughing* "Yes I am!!"
MJ: "Oh no!"
Shaun: "I'm giving it three point one four one five nine...." *Sadly the recording cuts out here....*
MJ: "Three point one four then?"
*Laughter*
Shaun: *Smiling* "NO! All of those numbers - that is Pi to twenty digits and that is what I want to give this!!"
*Mark chuckles*
Leigh: "Three point one four I think!"
MJ: "Yeah."
Shaun: "NO! And to be clear, joking aside, I actually didn't like that very much at all!"
MJ: "Oh dear."
Shaun: "I thought it was really poor."
MJ: "Seven there, so while I'm recording I shall add this up..."
Jason: "Did you give it anything?"
MJ: "I said seven."
*Leigh laughs*
Shaun: "Really?!"
MJ: "I reckon, well, I think I enjoyed it - when I could hear it! When people weren't chatting!" *Laughs* "So I'm adding up the scores as, you know when before (at the end of a Doctor's stint) when we vote for the best one? Even though we had already voted for them before?"
Leigh: "Yeah?"
MJ: "Well this time I've actually (written down the scores we have given)."
Jason: "I can't remember any of them!"
Shaun: "Oh, can we have a crack though!? Can we say which ones we found the most memorable and enjoyable before you tell us?"
MJ: "I will do, okay."
Leigh: "He would have to go through them all because I can't remember what ones there were!"
Shaun: "No what was most memorable to you?"
Jason: "People getting eating by plastic chairs! ('Terror Of The Autons') That was memorable."
Mark: "There was a whole season that was the same episode as The Master was always in it."
Leigh: "Yeah."
Jason: "When The Master was in prison - I liked that!"
Shaun: "Well that was actually going to be one of my favourites - I really liked the one where The Master was in prison ('The Sea Devils') - the whole sword fight thing. He was just being ridiculously awesome and, erm, there were sea monsters in it. I quite enjoy sea monsters."
Jason: "'Dæmons' with the whole cult."
Shaun: "Yeah but that was knocked down by Bok (little stone gargoyle that came to life) being awful!"
*MJ gets confused by trying to add up this times scores but finally does and has the full lot of scores*
MJ: "Right okay, so, erm, you don't want to know what you did, yet. You want to see if you can guess if you agree with what you've already said is the best scores for the ones!" (What a confusing sentence!!!) "So in the first season we had 'Spearhead From Space' - remember them?"
Leigh: "Hooray!"
Jason: "Hospital."
MJ: "'Doctor Who And The Silurians' - that was the....Silurians, yeah!"
Jason: "I don't remember that at all. Oh I do! they blew them up!"
MJ: "Yeah and they had the weird music!"
Jason: "And The Doctor got really angry until the next episode and then he was fine!"
Shaun: "And Rory died...."
*Jason laughs*
MJ: "'The Ambassadors Of Death' which was like the guys from out of space that came back and they were changed - and that's when we had UNIT having that useless gunfight!"
Leigh: "Ohhhh! Yeah, yeah, yeah!"
Shaun: "One of the many times!"
Jason: "That was it!"
Leigh: "What was the sh*t one where they were like - was it Daleks (or was it Cybermen?) walking over this green hill and UNIT were shooting at them?"
Shaun: "No that was the Daleks - that had the Ogrons?"
MJ: "Ogrons - yes. Then we had 'Inferno' was the last one where they -"
Jason: "- Oh I quite liked that! The time-travelling one."
MJ: "-'Inferno' was the alternate universe one that had the bad versions of the Brigadier and stuff."
Shaun: "That was good!"
Leigh: "No that was awful!"
Jason: "Oh I did like that one."
Shaun: "Yes because that had Liz Shaw and it had really sexy, EVIL Liz Shaw as well!"
MJ: "It did have sexy, evil Liz Shaw."
Jason: "I remember you NOT liking evil Liz Shaw as much as I expected you would."
Shaun: "No I preferred regular Liz Shaw, because she seemed smarter and feistier, but I quite enjoyed evil Liz Shaw."
MJ: "So which one of those do you think was the best? From what you remember?"
Leigh: "Okay well I'll go for 'Inferno' then."
Shaun: "Yeah I quite liked the parallel dimension."
Mark: "I'm going with 'Inferno'."
Shaun: "Actually can I give my whole score preference in this to Liz Shaw!?"
Jason: "Right I already know, as you have told me anyway, but I'm going for 'Inferno'. Although I know that's wrong!"
MJ: "It IS wrong! In fact from how you voted at the time the worst one was 'Ambassadors Of Death', then it was 'Spearhead From Space', then it was 'Inferno', THEN it was 'Doctor Who And The Siilurians'."
Mark: "Ahh okay."
Jason: "I remember that being quite a good story."
MJ: "I think so but I'm sure it had that weird music with flugelhorn or whatever it was!"
Leigh: *Smiling* "Hoorayyyyy! Flugelhorn??! You didn't say that!!"
Jason: "Welsh people, getting killed down pits and there was Silurians and there was an ecological message and then the Brigadier blew them all up!"
MJ: "Yeah. And the next season we were introduced to The Master! Where he was the villain every time."
Shaun: "Yayyyyyyyyy!!!!!"
MJ: "We had 'Terror Of The Autons', do you remember? With the plastic chair that attacked that guy."
Leigh: "Yes!"
MJ: "And the daffodils."
Jason: "And the little troll fella!"
MJ: "And the little troll guy. You had 'The Mind Of Evil' which had The Master's - I think she was Chinese, sidekick."
Shaun: "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he was trying to kick off World War Three."
MJ: "He was."
Shaun: "That was quite a good one. That brought in the rubber masks, if I recall." (He means what The Master used as a disguise - but he actually had worn one in 'Terror Of The Autons')
MJ: "Yes."
Shaun: *Laughing* "And he was constantly sitting, like, in a small tent -"
Leigh: "- a little Tent thing, yeah!"
Shaun: *Laughing* "- directly opposite UNIT!"
MJ: *Laughing* "That's right, yeah! 'Claws Of Axos' which had a chap in it called Pigbin Josh..."
*Cheers from the group*
Shaun: "That wasn't a great one."
MJ: "That was the gold fellas who, when they changed, weren't gold they were big tentacley-things!"
Jason: "Ohhhh Yeah!"
Shaun: "Yeah."
MJ: "'Colony In Space' which had, err, a colony in space! What happened in that one?"
Jason: "I seem to remember liking it."
MJ: "Oh that was the one where The Time Lords sent The Doctor to the future and there was that big machine that tried to attack him. Like a robot machine. They went to the Skybase... anyway The Master turned out to be the Magistrate."
Shaun: "Yes."
MJ: "He turned up at the end and I can't really remember what happened."
Jason: "Oh yeah that was alright."
MJ: "And then we finished with 'The Dæmons' which I always loved. You know, 'The Dæmons' set in the village - a bit Hammer Horror."
Jason: "That was with the Vicar wasn't it?"
Leigh: "I'll go with the 'Claws Of Axos' for THAT season, I think."
Shaun: "I am, once again, going to destroy the mould and just say The Master of all those episodes!" *Mark chuckles*
Jason: "He's in all of them."
Shaun: "Roger Delgado is just the best ever."
Jason: *Laughing* "It's not just one long episode!"
Shaun: "It might as well be because it is consistent!"
MJ: "Which one did you prefer, Jason?"
Jason: "I don't know.... I'm going to say 'The Dæmons' as I know that's the answer."
MJ: "It is the answer - yeah. That was a clear winner - we gave that eight point six six eight eight out of ten."
Shaun: "To be fair the only negative -"
Leigh: "- What did 'Claws Of Axos' get?"
MJ: "And they went underneath that bridge into the tunnel to go the future land."
Leigh: "Yeah!!! That was also sh*t!"
MJ: *Laughing* "Awww I quite liked that one! And didn't we have the fat guy who was in charge? Oh that might have been a different one... Anyway next we had 'The Curse Of Peladon' which was the first Peladon story."
*Leigh cheers and does Alpha Centuri voice along with Shaun!*
Jason: "I quite liked 'The Curse Of Peladon'."
MJ: "'The Sea Devils' which was The Master on the island. The Citroën 2CV with no doors!"
*Leigh laughs loudly*
Jason: "Futuristic!"
Shaun: "That was a good one!"
MJ: "Erm, they had all the naval base things and I think they went underwater and God knows what. Oh! The fencing fight with the sandwich in between!"
*Laughter*
Shaun: "Yep! Classic!"
MJ: "Erm, 'The Mutants' - which had -"
Shaun: "- I remember that one was quite clever! I quite liked the twist in that one."
MJ: "That had lots of caves and 'The Mutts' -"
Shaun: "- Yeah the people thought they were being poisoned and turned into things but actually it was all part of their evolution."
MJ: "Evolution, yeah! They were like butterflies (I mean that they had one stage like a grub type of creature and then become floating colourful beings)."
Shaun: "Their planet was going to go through a harsh time and they had needed to change - to adapt to survive it."
Jason: "Ohhhh! I remember that now! That was quite good."
MJ: "And then we finished with 'The Time Monster', which was that one where The Master was -"
Shaun: "- That was Kronos, right?"
MJ: "Kronos." *Makes weird Kronos/bird-type noises!*
*Laughter*
Shaun: "I quite liked that one!"
MJ: *To Leigh* "Oh, and we had your Ingrid Pitt!"
Leigh: "Oh Ingrid Pitt, yeah!"
Jason: "'The Book' didn't like it. 'The Book' gave that two out of ten."
Shaun: "Yes, but 'The Book' is always wrong!"
Jason: "Darth Vader was in it, though!"
Leigh: "I think that was the best season of this particular Doctor."
MJ: "Oh, do you think?"
Leigh: "Yeah, all of those were... they were all different - if you know what I mean?"
MJ: "Mm."
Mark: "Yes that is true."
Shaun: "And The Master was in a lot of them. Which is a huge bonus."
*Mark laughs*
MJ: "Errrr, he was in two of them."
Jason: "Was he?"
Shaun: "Yeah. That's fine. That's lots of them..."
MJ: "Hah! That's because they'd used him in every one in the previous season. So what do you think was the best one?"
Shaun: "Oh, the one where he's on the island."
MJ: "Oh, 'The Sea Devils'?"
Shaun: "I'd have given that a bonus point for The Master being in it!"
Leigh: "'Day Of The Daleks'."
MJ: "Yes I quite enjoyed that one, I think it was good. I think Mark doesn't care!"
Mark: "No, errr, 'The Sea Devils'."
MJ: "'The Sea Devils'."
Shaun: "So what one did we prefer?"
MJ: "Well, we preferred 'The Curse Of Peladon'! We gave that seven point nine two three six four three three out of ten!"
Leigh: "Why did we like 'The Curse Of Peladon'?"
Shaun: *Laughing* "You probably gave it ten out of ten for doing the voice!"
Jason: "'The Curse Of Peladon' wasn't bad and that's the one I remember most of. So I'm going with that!"
MJ: "And the second best one was 'Day Of The Daleks'. Then we sent 'The Sea Devils', 'The Time Monster' and 'The Mutants' was the worst one - with five point five etc."
Jason: "Which wasn't bad!"
MJ: "Then we went to Season Ten where we had 'Doctor Who Nights' with 'The Three Doctors'! The celebration!" *Laughs*
Jason: "Much better than I expected!"
Mark: "I really liked that one."
Shaun: "I still really like the concept of that over the execution. That was a really good concept."
Leigh: "No! The problem with the concept was that it reminded you of how much better the previous Doctor was!"
MJ: "Troughton, yeah."
Mark: "That's why I liked that one!"
MJ: "Erm, then we had 'Carnival Of Monsters'. Which obviously had the guy from 'Hi-Di-Hi' in the hat!"
Shaun: "I hated that one!"
MJ: *Laughing* "With the Drashigs!"
Jason: "And the discombobulator thing!"
Leigh: *Laughing* "Yeah! With the MEGA DEATH MACHINE!!"
Shaun: "Yeah, the Eradicator."
Jason: "Yeah that was it!"
Shaun: "I'll be right annoyed if that's our f**king highest rated one, because YOU guys all rated it highly!"
Jason: "It wasn't bad because they all went inside the machine!"
Shaun: "It WAS bad!"
MJ: "I enjoyed the grey guys who were a bit pompous."
Jason: "THREE fox heads were used for that episode!!" *Laughs*
Leigh: "Yayyyyy!!! Fox heads!!"
Shaun: "That's the one with the Drashigs?"
MJ: "Yeah. And one grey guy was like:" *Camp snooty voice* "Oh I don't think you can use THAT on them! Has The Director said you can use it?! Ohh blah blah blah blah!" *Creepy camp villain voice* "I don't think you can let them do THAT!" *Normal voice* "Said the creepy one!" *Laughs*
Jason: "He was also in 'Rocky Horror'!"
*Laughter*
Shaun: "It was also Doctor Who trying to do humour, which it has never done well." *I highly disagree with that! There have been many comic Doctor Who moments. Especially in later series*
MJ: "'Frontier In Space' was the next one which obviously -"
Jason: "- FRON-TIER IN SPACE!!!" (a la 'Pigs In Space'!)
MJ: "- ended up with The Master as the delegate from Earth. That was his last appearance as well."
Jason: "Oh I quite liked that!"
MJ: "Oh and also we had the Ogrons working for him, pretending to be other aliens and it turned out to be Daleks at the end."
Leigh: "Working as a waitress?"
Shaun: "In a Space-Cocktail Bar!"
MJ: "And, as I said, it turned out to be Daleks right at the end. Coming over the hill. And there was going to be a big alliance between them and The Master. And then the next one was 'Planet Of The Daleks' where, do you remember? The Doctor was knocked out for a bit and Jo Grant had to go through a jungle."
Jason: "Yeah."
MJ: "And they had the ice volcano didn't they?"
Jason: "Oh I quite liked that!"
Shaun: "That was the one with all the toy Daleks at the end?"
MJ: "Yeah, getting covered in ice-lava. And the guy said 'Come with me Jo, you've just met me. Why don't you go?' and she's like 'No, I'm not going to go off in a space ship with you. I'm not going to go, and leave The Doctor, with a man..."
Shaun: "The very next story!"
MJ: "The next one, 'The Green Death', she did that! That was the maggots and the Welsh people."
Shaun: "Yeah. Oh and the coat!!"
Leigh: *Laughing* "Oh-ho with the fly that could be killed by a coat!!"
Jason: "As all flies can."
MJ: "And the big old, was it BOSS? The computer that was in charge who sang and went crazy at the end!"
Leigh: "Boss Hog!"
MJ: *Laughs* "Hah! Boss Hog." *Mark chuckles* "Out of those, 'Three Doctors', 'Carnival Of Monsters', 'Frontier In Space', 'Planet Of The Daleks' and 'The Green Death'?"
Jason: "'The Green Death'."
Shaun: "Obviously the one with The Master."
Mark: "The one with the Daleks."
Jason: "'The Green Death'. It has a lift that didn't work properly. It's got maggots. It's got maggots aplenty!"
Leigh: *Laughing* "It's got a coat!"
Shaun: *Laughing* "Yes!"
Shaun: "- Err 'Invasion', was one I remember enjoying the most. But even THAT I got incredibly frustrated with how stupid it was!"
MJ: "Well that's true, that's true. So erm..."
Jason: "I'm going with 'Invasion Of The Dinosaurs'!"
Shaun: "Yes so I am I!"
MJ: "Yes I think it was the best."
Mark: "Yes - it had dinosaurs!"
MJ: "AND a good story!"
Shaun: *Laughing* "It had dinosaur models!"
Jason: "Not as bad as you expected though!"
Shaun: *Laughing* "No, apart from one! The T-rex!!"
MJ: "Well, we agree with ourselves! Because we gave that eight point two three five five six six six out of ten."
Mark: "Excellent."
MJ: "The next best one was 'Planet Of The Spiders'."
Mark: "Yeah."
MJ: "And then followed by 'The Time Warrior'."
Shaun: "Are you sure that's not bumped up if you use my ENTIRE twenty digit version of pi!!" *Laughs*
MJ: "'The Time Warrior'. 'Monster Of Peladon' and finally 'Death To The Daleks' - which we only gave five point three five nine etc."
Shaun: "Yeah."
Mark: "I thought 'Monster Of Peladon' was better than that?"
Jason: "Yeah but it's the same as the other Peladon one!"
Mark: "I suppose."
Shaun: "Yeah, it was boring and the same."
Jason: "It had a better looking royal person."
Shaun: *Laughs* "Yes it did! But it wasn't as annoying as the Dalek one, which just didn't make any f**king sense!"
*Laughter*
Mark: "That was clearly annoying."
Shaun: "All of the electronics were put out - yet the Daleks were still moving about!!"
Jason: "Get over it! But the rest of the story was okay -"
Shaun: "- No it isn't!!"
Leigh: "No, the story's fine! The problem is the Daleks are completely superfluous to the story!!"
*Mark giggles*
Shaun: *Laughing* "The story is mediocre, yeah, but the Daleks don't make ANY sense in the story."
Jason: "I agree with that with ANY Dalek story though!!" *Leigh laughs* "I don't like any story with 'Daleks' in the title because they're not necessary!"
Shaun: "Ooo, what about Christopher Eccleston's episode 'Dalek'?"
Mark: "He had to face his own fear (of spiders)."
Shaun: *Ranting* "He didn't have to face his own fear!! He had no fear of the f**king spiders!!"
Jason: "He did."
Shaun: "He didn't!
Mark: "He did! The whole serial he was scared of 'The Great One'." (The big ruling spider)
*Mark and Shaun argue a lot more which I can't make out whilst Jason talks*
Jason: "I liked the natives. I always like a native. I like a bureaucracy argument. I like it when there's a bit of mutiny amongst the people - not paperwork, you know."
MJ: "Yeah."
Jason: "The spiders were getting a bit bitchy with each other."
MJ: "They were, yeah!"
Jason: "I like Sarah Jane Smith getting taken over by a spider, which we didn't know!"
MJ: "Oh yeah yeah yeah! 'Cos they had invisible spiders on their back."
Jason: "Yeah."
Leigh: "That made Sarah Jane Smith actually vaguely interesting for a moment."
*MJ laughs - Mark and Shaun are still squabbling!*
Jason: "She's always interesting!"
Leigh: "Don't like her."
Jason: "I liked Tommy. Tommy was good. Nobody explained why he was there in the first place and what happened to him in the end."
Leigh: "He was a bit pointless."
Jason: "But I liked him becoming brainy."
MJ: "Yeah. I quite liked his sweet character. It was something different. Just someone who had to hang around doing odd-jobs and lifting things. Good old Mongo!" (Mongo was a simple character from the comedy Western film 'Blazing Saddles')
Jason: "Was he paid a good wage though? Or did they take advantage of him?"
Leigh: "I'll give it eight legs."
*Laughter*
Jason: "Out of?"
Leigh: "Eight legs."
Jason: "Wow, good score!"
MJ: "Errr what about you, Mark?"
Mark: *Having stopped squabbling for a short while now* "Erm, I will give it eleven legs."
MJ: *Bemused* "Out of ten?"
Mark: "Yes. Because he's dead!! Dead at last!!!"
*MJ sniggers*
Jason: "That's the bit you like best is it?"
Mark: "No more Pertwee!!"
*Laughter*
MJ: "No no, give me a proper score!" *Leigh laughs* "Compared to the others - you can't just score your relief!"
Shaun: "He's turned it up to eleven....legs!"
Mark: "I've turned it up to eleven. I'm happy he's dead."
*Laughter*
MJ: "Shaun?"
Shaun: *Smiling* "I, now, I'm really glad I didn't like that one. Because there's a reason for this, which is: me and Mark made the decision to give ridiculous point scores, after the actual number, which I decided I was only going to do for Pertwee."
MJ: "Oh okay."
Shaun: *Smiling* "And I really wanted to dislike that so I could give it the score that I'm going to give it, right." *Laughs* "And make you write ALL of this out and it be a thing!"
Mark: "Are you giving him Pi?"
Shaun: *Laughing* "Yes I am!!"
MJ: "Oh no!"
Shaun: "I'm giving it three point one four one five nine...." *Sadly the recording cuts out here....*
MJ: "Three point one four then?"
*Laughter*
Shaun: *Smiling* "NO! All of those numbers - that is Pi to twenty digits and that is what I want to give this!!"
*Mark chuckles*
Leigh: "Three point one four I think!"
MJ: "Yeah."
Shaun: "NO! And to be clear, joking aside, I actually didn't like that very much at all!"
MJ: "Oh dear."
Shaun: "I thought it was really poor."
MJ: "Seven there, so while I'm recording I shall add this up..."
Jason: "Did you give it anything?"
MJ: "I said seven."
*Leigh laughs*
Shaun: "Really?!"
MJ: "I reckon, well, I think I enjoyed it - when I could hear it! When people weren't chatting!" *Laughs* "So I'm adding up the scores as, you know when before (at the end of a Doctor's stint) when we vote for the best one? Even though we had already voted for them before?"
Leigh: "Yeah?"
MJ: "Well this time I've actually (written down the scores we have given)."
Jason: "I can't remember any of them!"
Shaun: "Oh, can we have a crack though!? Can we say which ones we found the most memorable and enjoyable before you tell us?"
MJ: "I will do, okay."
Leigh: "He would have to go through them all because I can't remember what ones there were!"
Shaun: "No what was most memorable to you?"
Jason: "People getting eating by plastic chairs! ('Terror Of The Autons') That was memorable."
Mark: "There was a whole season that was the same episode as The Master was always in it."
Leigh: "Yeah."
Jason: "When The Master was in prison - I liked that!"
Shaun: "Well that was actually going to be one of my favourites - I really liked the one where The Master was in prison ('The Sea Devils') - the whole sword fight thing. He was just being ridiculously awesome and, erm, there were sea monsters in it. I quite enjoy sea monsters."
Jason: "'Dæmons' with the whole cult."
Shaun: "Yeah but that was knocked down by Bok (little stone gargoyle that came to life) being awful!"
*MJ gets confused by trying to add up this times scores but finally does and has the full lot of scores*
MJ: "Right okay, so, erm, you don't want to know what you did, yet. You want to see if you can guess if you agree with what you've already said is the best scores for the ones!" (What a confusing sentence!!!) "So in the first season we had 'Spearhead From Space' - remember them?"
Leigh: "Hooray!"
Jason: "Hospital."
MJ: "'Doctor Who And The Silurians' - that was the....Silurians, yeah!"
Jason: "I don't remember that at all. Oh I do! they blew them up!"
MJ: "Yeah and they had the weird music!"
Jason: "And The Doctor got really angry until the next episode and then he was fine!"
Shaun: "And Rory died...."
*Jason laughs*
MJ: "'The Ambassadors Of Death' which was like the guys from out of space that came back and they were changed - and that's when we had UNIT having that useless gunfight!"
Leigh: "Ohhhh! Yeah, yeah, yeah!"
Shaun: "One of the many times!"
Jason: "That was it!"
Leigh: "What was the sh*t one where they were like - was it Daleks (or was it Cybermen?) walking over this green hill and UNIT were shooting at them?"
Shaun: "No that was the Daleks - that had the Ogrons?"
MJ: "Ogrons - yes. Then we had 'Inferno' was the last one where they -"
Jason: "- Oh I quite liked that! The time-travelling one."
MJ: "-'Inferno' was the alternate universe one that had the bad versions of the Brigadier and stuff."
Shaun: "That was good!"
Leigh: "No that was awful!"
Jason: "Oh I did like that one."
Shaun: "Yes because that had Liz Shaw and it had really sexy, EVIL Liz Shaw as well!"
MJ: "It did have sexy, evil Liz Shaw."
Jason: "I remember you NOT liking evil Liz Shaw as much as I expected you would."
Shaun: "No I preferred regular Liz Shaw, because she seemed smarter and feistier, but I quite enjoyed evil Liz Shaw."
MJ: "So which one of those do you think was the best? From what you remember?"
Leigh: "Okay well I'll go for 'Inferno' then."
Shaun: "Yeah I quite liked the parallel dimension."
Mark: "I'm going with 'Inferno'."
Shaun: "Actually can I give my whole score preference in this to Liz Shaw!?"
Jason: "Right I already know, as you have told me anyway, but I'm going for 'Inferno'. Although I know that's wrong!"
MJ: "It IS wrong! In fact from how you voted at the time the worst one was 'Ambassadors Of Death', then it was 'Spearhead From Space', then it was 'Inferno', THEN it was 'Doctor Who And The Siilurians'."
Mark: "Ahh okay."
Jason: "I remember that being quite a good story."
MJ: "I think so but I'm sure it had that weird music with flugelhorn or whatever it was!"
Leigh: *Smiling* "Hoorayyyyy! Flugelhorn??! You didn't say that!!"
Jason: "Welsh people, getting killed down pits and there was Silurians and there was an ecological message and then the Brigadier blew them all up!"
MJ: "Yeah. And the next season we were introduced to The Master! Where he was the villain every time."
Shaun: "Yayyyyyyyyy!!!!!"
MJ: "We had 'Terror Of The Autons', do you remember? With the plastic chair that attacked that guy."
Leigh: "Yes!"
MJ: "And the daffodils."
Jason: "And the little troll fella!"
MJ: "And the little troll guy. You had 'The Mind Of Evil' which had The Master's - I think she was Chinese, sidekick."
Shaun: "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he was trying to kick off World War Three."
MJ: "He was."
Shaun: "That was quite a good one. That brought in the rubber masks, if I recall." (He means what The Master used as a disguise - but he actually had worn one in 'Terror Of The Autons')
MJ: "Yes."
Shaun: *Laughing* "And he was constantly sitting, like, in a small tent -"
Leigh: "- a little Tent thing, yeah!"
Shaun: *Laughing* "- directly opposite UNIT!"
MJ: *Laughing* "That's right, yeah! 'Claws Of Axos' which had a chap in it called Pigbin Josh..."
*Cheers from the group*
Shaun: "That wasn't a great one."
MJ: "That was the gold fellas who, when they changed, weren't gold they were big tentacley-things!"
Jason: "Ohhhh Yeah!"
Shaun: "Yeah."
MJ: "'Colony In Space' which had, err, a colony in space! What happened in that one?"
Jason: "I seem to remember liking it."
MJ: "Oh that was the one where The Time Lords sent The Doctor to the future and there was that big machine that tried to attack him. Like a robot machine. They went to the Skybase... anyway The Master turned out to be the Magistrate."
Shaun: "Yes."
MJ: "He turned up at the end and I can't really remember what happened."
Jason: "Oh yeah that was alright."
MJ: "And then we finished with 'The Dæmons' which I always loved. You know, 'The Dæmons' set in the village - a bit Hammer Horror."
Jason: "That was with the Vicar wasn't it?"
Leigh: "I'll go with the 'Claws Of Axos' for THAT season, I think."
Shaun: "I am, once again, going to destroy the mould and just say The Master of all those episodes!" *Mark chuckles*
Jason: "He's in all of them."
Shaun: "Roger Delgado is just the best ever."
Jason: *Laughing* "It's not just one long episode!"
Shaun: "It might as well be because it is consistent!"
MJ: "Which one did you prefer, Jason?"
Jason: "I don't know.... I'm going to say 'The Dæmons' as I know that's the answer."
MJ: "It is the answer - yeah. That was a clear winner - we gave that eight point six six eight eight out of ten."
Shaun: "To be fair the only negative -"
Leigh: "- What did 'Claws Of Axos' get?"
MJ: "Errr that's not the lowest one - six point eight one eight four. The lowest one was 'Colony In Space' then we had 'Mind Of Evil', then 'Claws Of Axos', then 'Terror Of The Autons' and then 'The Dæmons'. And then Season Nine we had 'Day Of The Daleks' which has the return of the Daleks. You know, two Daleks and two Ogrons really slowly advancing towards the house!"
Leigh: "Oh yeah! That was sh*t!"
Leigh: "Yeah!!! That was also sh*t!"
MJ: *Laughing* "Awww I quite liked that one! And didn't we have the fat guy who was in charge? Oh that might have been a different one... Anyway next we had 'The Curse Of Peladon' which was the first Peladon story."
*Leigh cheers and does Alpha Centuri voice along with Shaun!*
Jason: "I quite liked 'The Curse Of Peladon'."
MJ: "'The Sea Devils' which was The Master on the island. The Citroën 2CV with no doors!"
*Leigh laughs loudly*
Jason: "Futuristic!"
Shaun: "That was a good one!"
MJ: "Erm, they had all the naval base things and I think they went underwater and God knows what. Oh! The fencing fight with the sandwich in between!"
*Laughter*
Shaun: "Yep! Classic!"
MJ: "Erm, 'The Mutants' - which had -"
Shaun: "- I remember that one was quite clever! I quite liked the twist in that one."
MJ: "That had lots of caves and 'The Mutts' -"
Shaun: "- Yeah the people thought they were being poisoned and turned into things but actually it was all part of their evolution."
MJ: "Evolution, yeah! They were like butterflies (I mean that they had one stage like a grub type of creature and then become floating colourful beings)."
Shaun: "Their planet was going to go through a harsh time and they had needed to change - to adapt to survive it."
Jason: "Ohhhh! I remember that now! That was quite good."
MJ: "And then we finished with 'The Time Monster', which was that one where The Master was -"
Shaun: "- That was Kronos, right?"
MJ: "Kronos." *Makes weird Kronos/bird-type noises!*
*Laughter*
Shaun: "I quite liked that one!"
MJ: *To Leigh* "Oh, and we had your Ingrid Pitt!"
Leigh: "Oh Ingrid Pitt, yeah!"
Jason: "'The Book' didn't like it. 'The Book' gave that two out of ten."
Shaun: "Yes, but 'The Book' is always wrong!"
Jason: "Darth Vader was in it, though!"
Leigh: "I think that was the best season of this particular Doctor."
MJ: "Oh, do you think?"
Leigh: "Yeah, all of those were... they were all different - if you know what I mean?"
MJ: "Mm."
Mark: "Yes that is true."
Shaun: "And The Master was in a lot of them. Which is a huge bonus."
*Mark laughs*
MJ: "Errrr, he was in two of them."
Jason: "Was he?"
Shaun: "Yeah. That's fine. That's lots of them..."
MJ: "Hah! That's because they'd used him in every one in the previous season. So what do you think was the best one?"
Shaun: "Oh, the one where he's on the island."
MJ: "Oh, 'The Sea Devils'?"
Shaun: "I'd have given that a bonus point for The Master being in it!"
Leigh: "'Day Of The Daleks'."
MJ: "Yes I quite enjoyed that one, I think it was good. I think Mark doesn't care!"
Mark: "No, errr, 'The Sea Devils'."
MJ: "'The Sea Devils'."
Shaun: "So what one did we prefer?"
MJ: "Well, we preferred 'The Curse Of Peladon'! We gave that seven point nine two three six four three three out of ten!"
Leigh: "Why did we like 'The Curse Of Peladon'?"
Shaun: *Laughing* "You probably gave it ten out of ten for doing the voice!"
Jason: "'The Curse Of Peladon' wasn't bad and that's the one I remember most of. So I'm going with that!"
MJ: "And the second best one was 'Day Of The Daleks'. Then we sent 'The Sea Devils', 'The Time Monster' and 'The Mutants' was the worst one - with five point five etc."
Jason: "Which wasn't bad!"
MJ: "Then we went to Season Ten where we had 'Doctor Who Nights' with 'The Three Doctors'! The celebration!" *Laughs*
Jason: "Much better than I expected!"
Mark: "I really liked that one."
Shaun: "I still really like the concept of that over the execution. That was a really good concept."
Leigh: "No! The problem with the concept was that it reminded you of how much better the previous Doctor was!"
MJ: "Troughton, yeah."
Mark: "That's why I liked that one!"
MJ: "Erm, then we had 'Carnival Of Monsters'. Which obviously had the guy from 'Hi-Di-Hi' in the hat!"
Shaun: "I hated that one!"
MJ: *Laughing* "With the Drashigs!"
Jason: "And the discombobulator thing!"
Leigh: *Laughing* "Yeah! With the MEGA DEATH MACHINE!!"
Shaun: "Yeah, the Eradicator."
Jason: "Yeah that was it!"
Shaun: "I'll be right annoyed if that's our f**king highest rated one, because YOU guys all rated it highly!"
Jason: "It wasn't bad because they all went inside the machine!"
Shaun: "It WAS bad!"
MJ: "I enjoyed the grey guys who were a bit pompous."
Jason: "THREE fox heads were used for that episode!!" *Laughs*
Leigh: "Yayyyyy!!! Fox heads!!"
Shaun: "That's the one with the Drashigs?"
MJ: "Yeah. And one grey guy was like:" *Camp snooty voice* "Oh I don't think you can use THAT on them! Has The Director said you can use it?! Ohh blah blah blah blah!" *Creepy camp villain voice* "I don't think you can let them do THAT!" *Normal voice* "Said the creepy one!" *Laughs*
Jason: "He was also in 'Rocky Horror'!"
*Laughter*
Shaun: "It was also Doctor Who trying to do humour, which it has never done well." *I highly disagree with that! There have been many comic Doctor Who moments. Especially in later series*
MJ: "'Frontier In Space' was the next one which obviously -"
Jason: "- FRON-TIER IN SPACE!!!" (a la 'Pigs In Space'!)
MJ: "- ended up with The Master as the delegate from Earth. That was his last appearance as well."
Jason: "Oh I quite liked that!"
MJ: "Oh and also we had the Ogrons working for him, pretending to be other aliens and it turned out to be Daleks at the end."
Leigh: "Working as a waitress?"
Shaun: "In a Space-Cocktail Bar!"
MJ: "And, as I said, it turned out to be Daleks right at the end. Coming over the hill. And there was going to be a big alliance between them and The Master. And then the next one was 'Planet Of The Daleks' where, do you remember? The Doctor was knocked out for a bit and Jo Grant had to go through a jungle."
Jason: "Yeah."
MJ: "And they had the ice volcano didn't they?"
Jason: "Oh I quite liked that!"
Shaun: "That was the one with all the toy Daleks at the end?"
MJ: "Yeah, getting covered in ice-lava. And the guy said 'Come with me Jo, you've just met me. Why don't you go?' and she's like 'No, I'm not going to go off in a space ship with you. I'm not going to go, and leave The Doctor, with a man..."
Shaun: "The very next story!"
MJ: "The next one, 'The Green Death', she did that! That was the maggots and the Welsh people."
Shaun: "Yeah. Oh and the coat!!"
Leigh: *Laughing* "Oh-ho with the fly that could be killed by a coat!!"
Jason: "As all flies can."
MJ: "And the big old, was it BOSS? The computer that was in charge who sang and went crazy at the end!"
Leigh: "Boss Hog!"
MJ: *Laughs* "Hah! Boss Hog." *Mark chuckles* "Out of those, 'Three Doctors', 'Carnival Of Monsters', 'Frontier In Space', 'Planet Of The Daleks' and 'The Green Death'?"
Jason: "'The Green Death'."
Shaun: "Obviously the one with The Master."
Mark: "The one with the Daleks."
Jason: "'The Green Death'. It has a lift that didn't work properly. It's got maggots. It's got maggots aplenty!"
Leigh: *Laughing* "It's got a coat!"
Shaun: *Laughing* "Yes!"
Jason: "It's got a dragonfly which was foreboding and threatening. Until the coat!"
Shaun: *Laughing* "Until you saw the f**king thing!!"
MJ: "What about you, Mark? Do you think 'The Three Doctors' because it had two decent Doctors in it?"
Mark: "Yeah! That was exactly my reasoning!"
Leigh: "Oh sorry I forgot 'The Three Doctors' was part of this! Yeah 'The Three Doctors', definitely!"
*Mark giggles*
Jason: "Oh and 'The Green Death' also had in it Welsh people called Dai and Fell!"
Shaun: "Yeah but I'm sticking with my two Master stories."
MJ: "So we voted the best one as, of course, 'The Three Doctors'. Followed, just, by 'The Green Death'. Just ahead of 'Frontier In Space' - only by about point five. Or less than that. No, point nought five! And then 'Carnival Of Monsters', then 'Planet Of The Daleks' was the worst one. Six point two two eight out of ten. And then THIS season was 'The Time Warrior' - "
Jason: "- I liked that."
MJ: "- Obviously with 'The Poo'. What's his name? Oh, the Sontaran. Potato!"
Jason: "Potato! Not a poo!"
Leigh: "I always thought he was a poo!"
MJ: "Then we had 'Invasion Of The Dinosaurs' where obviously Mike Yates betrayed and err - "
Leigh: "- All the dinosaurs!"
MJ: "And then Edith (from 'Allo 'Allo) on a space ship - which wasn't a space ship! 'Death To The Daleks' which had no -"
Shaun: "- Sense! Logic!"
MJ: "Oh you hated that one, didn't you!? It wasn't their actual death anyway. Then we had 'Monster Of Peladon' which we saw last time."
Shaun: "Do it in the voice!"
MJ: *Puts on the high Alpha Centuri voice* "'Monster Of Peladon'!"
Shaun: *High Alpha Centuri voice* "'Monster Of Peladon'!"
Leigh: *High Alpha Centuri voice* "'Monster Of Peladon'!"
MJ: "And then we had 'Planet Of The Spiders'. So really, I'm looking at this and I don't think we liked this season as much as a lot of the other ones."
Leigh: "No."
Jason: "Not as much as the last one."
Shaun: "No, I wonder why THAT might be - 'cos Roger Delgado was dead!" *Mark chuckles*
"And I loved him!"
Jason: "I thought 'Time Warrior' was fine. 'Dinosaurs' was fine."
Leigh: "'Time Warrior' was NOT fine. 'Dinosaurs' was a bit poo."
Jason: "You had Dot Cotton. You had Denim." *Laughter*
Shaun: "Those aren't good things!"
Jason: "Those are all things beginning in 'D'! In 'Death To The Daleks' there were lots of 'D's' in that!"
*Leigh laughs*
Shaun: "I remember being frustrated - like 'Planet Of The Dinosaurs' was one I remember -"(Clearly not as he's got the name wrong!)
MJ: "- Errr, 'Invasion', yeah?"
MJ: "Well that's true, that's true. So erm..."
Jason: "I'm going with 'Invasion Of The Dinosaurs'!"
Shaun: "Yes so I am I!"
MJ: "Yes I think it was the best."
Mark: "Yes - it had dinosaurs!"
MJ: "AND a good story!"
Shaun: *Laughing* "It had dinosaur models!"
Jason: "Not as bad as you expected though!"
Shaun: *Laughing* "No, apart from one! The T-rex!!"
MJ: "Well, we agree with ourselves! Because we gave that eight point two three five five six six six out of ten."
Mark: "Excellent."
MJ: "The next best one was 'Planet Of The Spiders'."
Mark: "Yeah."
MJ: "And then followed by 'The Time Warrior'."
Shaun: "Are you sure that's not bumped up if you use my ENTIRE twenty digit version of pi!!" *Laughs*
MJ: "'The Time Warrior'. 'Monster Of Peladon' and finally 'Death To The Daleks' - which we only gave five point three five nine etc."
Shaun: "Yeah."
Mark: "I thought 'Monster Of Peladon' was better than that?"
Jason: "Yeah but it's the same as the other Peladon one!"
Mark: "I suppose."
Shaun: "Yeah, it was boring and the same."
Jason: "It had a better looking royal person."
Shaun: *Laughs* "Yes it did! But it wasn't as annoying as the Dalek one, which just didn't make any f**king sense!"
*Laughter*
Mark: "That was clearly annoying."
Shaun: "All of the electronics were put out - yet the Daleks were still moving about!!"
Jason: "Get over it! But the rest of the story was okay -"
Shaun: "- No it isn't!!"
Leigh: "No, the story's fine! The problem is the Daleks are completely superfluous to the story!!"
*Mark giggles*
Shaun: *Laughing* "The story is mediocre, yeah, but the Daleks don't make ANY sense in the story."
Jason: "I agree with that with ANY Dalek story though!!" *Leigh laughs* "I don't like any story with 'Daleks' in the title because they're not necessary!"
Shaun: "Ooo, what about Christopher Eccleston's episode 'Dalek'?"
MJ: "Ooo! What about 'The Book'?!"
Jason: "Sh*t I just shut the page!"
Shaun: "Hang on hang on, Leigh's left the room!"
*We have a break whilst Jason finds the page again and people need a toilet break. When we return...*
MJ: "Oh, by the way, we didn't say about the regeneration did we? It was a bit pants wasn't it?"
Shaun: "It was sh*t!"
Mark: "It was rubbish."
Jason: "There's worse ones."
MJ: "Is there!?"
Jason: "I'm sure there are."
MJ: "Well, Colin Baker - because he doesn't get one! But that's probably it?"
Jason: "And then Colin Baker into Sylvestor McCoy is a bit sh*t as well." (That's the one I meant, Jason!)
Mark: "Worse than racism and disappointment?"
*Loud laughter*
Leigh: *Coming back into the room confused* "What does 'The Book' say, what?"
MJ: "We were just saying how we thought the regeneration was not, that, anything special (good English!). It was a bit disappointing in the end, after all that."
Shaun: *Laughing* "That's NOT what Mark said!" *Mark giggles*
Leigh: "Was he talking about a 'Razy Lacist'?"
*Laughter*
MJ: "Oh yeah the little racist guy! With the faux-Chinese accent."
Mark: "Jason said that there are worse regenerations, and I said 'What, worse than racism and disappointment'?"
MJ: *Laughs* "That's the name of my new band!"
Shaun: *Smiling* "You see I've got to be honest, I really enjoyed the idea of THAT guy being the Time Lord, who they referenced in previous ones, was The Doctor's mentor. But I'm sorry! It's not getting a point for being a racist stereotype! That just takes the point of that cool idea away! That was terrible!" *Laughs*
MJ: "And also, why WAS he this little Chinese/Tibetan guy?"
Leigh: "Gnome."
MJ: "Because THAT'S not a Time Lord-ish? They're Gallifreyan, so why's he?..."
Shaun: "Well, they can be anything."
*Jason laughs*
MJ: *To Jason* "Can you read it now?! I'm up to forty four minutes!"
Jason: "It doesn't matter! You can edit it down!! You don't have to type EVER minute!" *The fact that I'm typing this NOW means I do!!* "If I saw 'One Two Seventy-Nine' you don't have to do all that!"
Shaun: "He does have to when I'm doing it! It;s my score!!"
MJ: *To self* "I'm having the last Jelly Baby!"
Leigh: "That was MY Jelly Baby!!"
MJ: "Yes I will edit it (I haven't). I might change how I do this after Pertwee. (I'll see!)"
Jason: "What does 'The Book' say!?"
MJ: "Yeah!"
*All during this next bit Shaun starts shooting at everyone with a toy gun with rubber bullet things! Leigh laughs after each time!*
Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "'Giant spiders try to invade the Earth -"
Leigh: "- They don't TRY very hard, to be fair!"
Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "'- try to invade the Earth through the pliable minds of meditating humans'."
MJ: "Right."
Jason: "Om."*Gets shot* "Ow!"
Shaun: *Smiling* "I'm very, very sorry Jason! I mean you give us all the guns - what's going to happen!!?"
MJ: "Hurry up!!"
Shaun: "It's f**king foam!"
Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "'- Filming took place in Tidmarsh and Stratfield Mor'-"*Gets shot* "OW!"
MJ: "Stratfield Mor Ow?"
Jason: "Mortimer!"
Shaun: "Where the Hell is Stratfield Mor Ow?!? I've got one left."
Jason: "Sh*t I just shut the page!"
Shaun: "Hang on hang on, Leigh's left the room!"
*We have a break whilst Jason finds the page again and people need a toilet break. When we return...*
MJ: "Oh, by the way, we didn't say about the regeneration did we? It was a bit pants wasn't it?"
Shaun: "It was sh*t!"
Mark: "It was rubbish."
Jason: "There's worse ones."
MJ: "Is there!?"
Jason: "I'm sure there are."
MJ: "Well, Colin Baker - because he doesn't get one! But that's probably it?"
Jason: "And then Colin Baker into Sylvestor McCoy is a bit sh*t as well." (That's the one I meant, Jason!)
Mark: "Worse than racism and disappointment?"
*Loud laughter*
Leigh: *Coming back into the room confused* "What does 'The Book' say, what?"
MJ: "We were just saying how we thought the regeneration was not, that, anything special (good English!). It was a bit disappointing in the end, after all that."
Shaun: *Laughing* "That's NOT what Mark said!" *Mark giggles*
Leigh: "Was he talking about a 'Razy Lacist'?"
*Laughter*
MJ: "Oh yeah the little racist guy! With the faux-Chinese accent."
Mark: "Jason said that there are worse regenerations, and I said 'What, worse than racism and disappointment'?"
MJ: *Laughs* "That's the name of my new band!"
Shaun: *Smiling* "You see I've got to be honest, I really enjoyed the idea of THAT guy being the Time Lord, who they referenced in previous ones, was The Doctor's mentor. But I'm sorry! It's not getting a point for being a racist stereotype! That just takes the point of that cool idea away! That was terrible!" *Laughs*
MJ: "And also, why WAS he this little Chinese/Tibetan guy?"
Leigh: "Gnome."
MJ: "Because THAT'S not a Time Lord-ish? They're Gallifreyan, so why's he?..."
Shaun: "Well, they can be anything."
MJ: "What, they can be racist!?"
*Leigh laughs*
Shaun: "Well the current Doctor (at time of writing Peter Capaldi) is Scottish and he doesn't sound like Matt Smith! But then Matt Smith didn't sound like, erm, Chris Eccleston."
MJ: "No."
Shaun: "Chris Eccleston didn't sound like Tom Baker and so on and so forth. As long as it's a white man the internet won't lose it's sh*t!"
Leigh: "And Chris Eccleston spent hardly any of his time, as The Doctor, running Formula One!"
Shaun: "Yes!"
Mark: "Yeah."
MJ: "Cool."
Shaun: "What are we doing? I think we're up to 'The Book' right?!"
Leigh: "Yeah, MJ is going to tell us our average score for this one?"
MJ: "Oh it was seven point oh eight six, wasn't it?"
Shaun: "No! It was somewhere around there but with far more decimal points!"
MJ: *To Jason* "Can you read it now?! I'm up to forty four minutes!"
Jason: "It doesn't matter! You can edit it down!! You don't have to type EVER minute!" *The fact that I'm typing this NOW means I do!!* "If I saw 'One Two Seventy-Nine' you don't have to do all that!"
Shaun: "He does have to when I'm doing it! It;s my score!!"
MJ: *To self* "I'm having the last Jelly Baby!"
Leigh: "That was MY Jelly Baby!!"
MJ: "Yes I will edit it (I haven't). I might change how I do this after Pertwee. (I'll see!)"
Jason: "What does 'The Book' say!?"
MJ: "Yeah!"
*All during this next bit Shaun starts shooting at everyone with a toy gun with rubber bullet things! Leigh laughs after each time!*
Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "'Giant spiders try to invade the Earth -"
Leigh: "- They don't TRY very hard, to be fair!"
Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "'- try to invade the Earth through the pliable minds of meditating humans'."
MJ: "Right."
Jason: "Om."*Gets shot* "Ow!"
Shaun: *Smiling* "I'm very, very sorry Jason! I mean you give us all the guns - what's going to happen!!?"
MJ: "Hurry up!!"
Shaun: "It's f**king foam!"
Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "'- Filming took place in Tidmarsh and Stratfield Mor'-"*Gets shot* "OW!"
MJ: "Stratfield Mor Ow?"
Jason: "Mortimer!"
Shaun: "Where the Hell is Stratfield Mor Ow?!? I've got one left."
Shaun: *Laughing* "Okay! There it's shot. Done!" *Laughing* "There's nothing more to do.... Ooo, bullets!"
*Leigh laughs*
Jason: "I'm regretting getting those out!"
Shaun: "Yeah, fair enough!"
Jason: "'- Filming' - Arrgh! I can feel blood in my mouth!" *Laughter* *Reading from 'The Book'* "'- Filming took place in Tidmarsh and Stratfield Mortimer (Berks), Membury Airfield and Le Marchant Barracks (Wilt's) and the River Severn (Gloucs)'."
MJ: "Hurry up!" (You could tell I wasn't drinking!)
Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "'The Part Two chase involved Bessie, a CSO flying Whomobile, a gyrocopter, a hovercraft and a speedboat. Ian Scoones and Steve Beaumont constructed approx twenty latex covered spiders' - that's the most costumes we've had ever, I think!"
MJ: "Yeah."
Shaun: "Yeah."
Jason: "Well, besides maggots. There were a lot of maggots."
Shaun: "They used a lot of real maggots didn't they?"
Jason: *Defeated* "I don't know! Anyway 'The Book' doesn't say that!" *Reading from 'The Book'* "'The original 'Great One' (the main spider) prop was deemed too horrific -'"
Mark: "- What?!"
MJ: "Oh!"
Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "'- And so was substituted by the Queen Spider version prior to studio recording."
Shaun: "Oh that's rubbish."
Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "'Verdict:' Are you ready for this? 'With its avant-garde editing, ridiculous OTT chase and genuine witty dialogue, especially from Tommy, this story is a fitting paean to the Pertwee era. Funny, sad, scary and thought-provoking - even Jenny Laird's terrible acting can't spoil this'-"
*Laughter*
Shaun: "- Was she the Mother?!"
Jason: "I don't know!"
Shaun: "Was she the Mother on the planet? 'Cos I picked her out as a particularly awful actor!"
Jason: "She was Neska."
Mark: "Yeah."
Shaun: "Yeah, yeah, no she was f*king awful!"
Jason: "Worse than Chubby Oates!?"
Leigh: *Laughing* "Chubby Oates was awesome!"
Jason: *Reading from 'The Book'* "'- can't spoil this heady brew. Ten out of ten'."
MJ: *Incredulous* "Ten out of ten!!?"
Shaun: "No, that is one hundred percent wrong! That one was crap!"
Jason: "Join us next time for 'Robot'!"
Photo 7: At Jason's house.
Mark (with DVD case) and
MJ (with Shaun's Master sign).
********************************************************************************************************
So the end of Pertwee - the end of a very long era! And the end of a very long recording session! So here, again, are the scores for the final Pertwee story:
Jason: 6.29
Leigh: 8 (legs)
Mark: 11 (legs)
Shaun: 3.14159 (etc)
MJ: 7
Which gave us the average of 7.086 out of 10. It was quite a high score overall - much to Shaun's annoyance. We then went on to have a summing up of Pertwee's era....
********************************************************************************************************
MJ: "'Okay so what was the overall feeling on Pertwee. I know lots of you didn't seem keen."
Shaun: "Right, I liked Pertwee overall. I thought he had more time to be serious than, erm, Trout-Man."
MJ: "Mhm."
Shaun: "I didn't dislike Trout-Man. Erm, but I thought Pertwee having a nemesis really added something. Whereas Trout-Man largely went through a lot of the same situations as the previous Doctor. So it allowed him to flourish a little more in those roles. Overall he didn't really add much - he was more of a step back. He was a bit more of an, erm, he was a bit safer than Trout-Man and Hartnell's performances."
MJ: "I suppose."
Mark: "But Shaun likes Pertwee because of The Master!"
Shaun: "The Master was, by far, the best thing of ANY Doctor Who so far!"
MJ: "Yes. Well I did think the last season probably wasn't AS fun. I don't think any of them would have been AS fun if it hadn't of been for The Master in them."
Shaun: "Mm! No, I completely agree!"
Jason: "I felt The Master made things feel a bit samey in some ways."
Leigh: "What? Did you always think The Master was going to form some sort of alliance and then get betrayed!!?"
Jason: "Yes!"
MJ: "Oh no, there was THAT, but it was the humour of how he was going to do it and so on."
Jason: "I liked UNIT."
MJ: "Yes! I liked UNIT."
Shaun: "Allow me to put it this way: eighty percent of Doctor Who stories are exactly the f**king same! Right? Now when it started we had two stories. There was the alien ones and then there was the ones where he went back in history-"
Jason: "- Historicals."
Shaun: "- and just did NOTHING!"
Jason: "No, they observed! And sometimes saying 'You're great'."
Leigh: "Did they also re-write history? Like 'Duck Tales'?!"
*Mark and Jason laugh*
Shaun: "But adding an ACTUAL nemesis, who was equal on every level, is a huge advancement for the show. Err, Roger Delgado, as I've mentioned many, many a time, was f**king phenomenal and is the best Master of all time!"
Jason: "Oh he was very charismatic - I'll give him that."
Shaun: "Err, so even when those stories were somewhat samey, that gives you three story types at least. Which is better than you had before, and you had an actor in there who was just an absolutely f**king captivating presence on-screen."
MJ: "The Doctor being stranded on Earth at first, did you like that?"
Leigh: "No."
Shaun: "I didn't at first, but I got used to it quite quickly 'cos we all started taking the p*ss out of UNIT and that became funny!"
*Leigh chuckles*
MJ: "That did. I quite liked the UNIT family. For all their little foibles and stuff I liked the characters in it. I liked Benton, I liked The Brigadier, I liked Mike Yates. I was happy with them."
Jason: "I don't think it makes any difference to the stories it's just the believability of suddenly everything's on Earth. It's like 'Torchwood'. It's like 'Oh, it's all coming here'!"
MJ: "Not just on Earth, but in England. In the Home Counties!!" *Laughs*
Mark: *Laughing* "Specifically above UNIT HQ!"
Jason: "But if The Master is in the Home Counties, and he's looking after it all, then it makes perfect sense."
Shaun: "Yeah but part of his thing was he wanted to keep attacking The Doctor. So he would BE where The Doctor was!"
Jason: "Yeah it was written fine but it couldn;t go on for any more!"
Shaun: "I mean, don't get me wrong, I've always longed for something we eventually got with River Song (Spoilers!) which was that they keep meeting in the opposite order that chronology allows. There's no reason The Master can't be like 'I've tried to kill him three times, it hasn't worked. I'm going to go back to when he was six and shoot him in the face'! Or 'I'm going to skip twenty years and go back when he's forgotten I'm even a thing and shoot him in the face'! That would be fine."
Mark: *Chuckling* "But you can't really do that. There's no elaborate plan behind that!"
MJ: "Well that would be weird because then he would go back and kill him, but then his young self would grow up not having that nemesis and so he would grow up to not want to bother going back to kill him! 'Cos he wouldn't know!"
Shaun: "I know, but The Master isn't the kind of character to give a sh*t about a time paradox, whereas The Doctor would, and would then have to go back and try and fix that!"
Leigh: "This is why time travel things don't work!"
Jason: "He might not give a sh*t, but it would still happen."
Shaun: "He'd be like 'I've created this time paradox, I still get to win in one of the two futures! That's groovy'!"
MJ: "Right we're going to pose for photographs now we've had a chat 'cos I've got a long day tomorrow! Errr join us next time for Baker Of The Tom."
Shaun: "JASON YOU'VE GOT A CAT ON YOUR HEAD!"
*Leigh laughs*
MJ: "Bye!"
Photo 8: At Jason's house.
Shaun hides behind his Master sign!
Shaun hides behind his Master sign!
********************************************************************************************************
As the actress said to the Bishop - that was a long one! Right no more Pertwee, I write this after we have now watched the first Tom Baker story! But I shall type that up later!
Until then I shall return, yes, I shall return....
MJ - 18/04/2017
No comments:
Post a Comment